


Emptiness v.s. Family

by KakitoSougo



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: (actually im just an awful person and forgot to keep her as them so please role with it im so sorry, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, I am not sure how but like it happened so, Langst, Like super sorry, My First Work in This Fandom, Parasites, Pidge switches between they/them and she/her, a lot of arguing and screaming, emotions are going haywire in this fic, ends up as coran angst, finally figured out where i was going with this, im sorry..., kinda attempted at something here and i'm semi proud of it, not really - Freeform, now its just angst in general, oh well, shesh writing is tiriing, the world may never know, there are no romantic relationships, unless you got them shipping glasses on then there's a whole bunch, where am i going with this???, yay, you know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-09
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2018-11-12 03:05:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 28,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11152920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KakitoSougo/pseuds/KakitoSougo
Summary: Lance has a bad day... actually bad doesn't even begin to describe it. Unfortunately, it takes a while for the team to help. But honest to god they never knew it was this bad.Unfortunately, fate has a way of making things go from bad, to worse, to hell...I would like to say that, no the team does not hate him, this is not that type a fic.





	1. Chapter 1

"Lance! What the hell are you doing?!" -Keith

"Go away, Lance! Can't you see I'm busy!!   -Pidge

"Lance, you're in the way. Can't you wait till later." - Hunk

"Lance, if you're not gonna take this seriously, leave." - Shiro

"Shut up Lance! Not everything is about you!"- Allura

"Lance, my boy. Not right now, I can't risk this being ruined." - Coran

Lance curled in on himself as he laid in his bed, tears streaming down his cheeks. His muffled sobs filled the room while the words of his  team,  _ his  _ _family_ , filled his head. His room was a mess after Lance let his emotions rule him and destroy the room. Today was the absolute worse.

First Lance woke up late and was late to the breakfast meeting. Then he was today's weak link in the training exercise, pushing Keith to his limit which made Shiro more irritable. All of his jokes to lighten the mood backfired and pissed the princess off the most. Almost everything he touched was ruined in some way starting with Hunk's meal this morning to Coran's personal project just the hour before.

Now in his room, Lance cried out all of his frustrations and emotions while the blue lion attempted to comfort him. Hours pass before Lance felt the strength to move once again before Blue finally convinced him he was okay. The clock Pidge had made for him said it was half passed midnight.

Lance stayed in the bed staring at the clock watching the hours roll by listening to Blue's purrs. He barely reacted as he listened to his alarm go off, not thinking while he prepared for the day and made his way to the dining room.

Hunk and Coran were cooking in the kitchen and no one else was to be seen, so Lance quietly sat down and waited.

He did not react when Keith and Pidge came in quietly, both lost in their own thought.

Neither of them noticed Lance.

Next Shiro and Allura came in talking about strategies and the sort.

They didn't notice him either.

Lance thought he would feel, at the very least, a little disheartened but instead, he quietly watched them, his chest empty, expression blank. It wasn't until Hunk came in and said good morning to Lance that anyone noticed him.

"Good morning Lance!" A small smile began to form-

"Quiznack!! When the hell did you get here?!" Pidge yelled accusingly at Lance, the others were just as surprised as her, after all, none of them saw him. The smile slipped away as he turned to them.

Allura replied before Lance even opened his mouth,  "He probably just got here and stayed quiet so we could not say he was late." Keith and Pidge nodded along while Shiro and Hunk shrugged figuring it was all in good fun.

Coran placed a plate in front of Lance and gave him a soft smile. "Do not listen to them boy-o," He said before joining the others in conversation.

Lance couldn't bring himself to eat, barely nibbling at what he assumed to be a heavenly meal Hunk cooked up. Thankfully, or maybe not, the others didn't seem to notice and breakfast passed by without Lance making a single joke. The team moved on to exercises.

Today was physical training as a team to practice watching each other's backs. Lance forced himself to focus solely on the exercise instead of the ever growing empty feeling in his chest. It wasn't until after the training that the emptiness spread touching the other paladins, filling them slowly. They turned to each other in curiosity, each with varying shades of concern.

Lance couldn't bring himself to act confused as he let out another joke towards the princess hoping she would laugh, take their minds (his mind) away from the emptiness. She didn't.

Ignoring Lance she turned to the other paladins, "You all did well today. You get two of your earth hours for rest and then prepare for practice with the Lions." She turned to Lance with something short of a glare, "Do not be late."

The paladins filed out of the training room each head in opposite directions, except Lance.He stayed behind, watching them leave letting the hollowness in his chest swallow him whole.

Blue purred and whined uselessly in his head hoping to be of some help as her paladin closed off his heart. Her own metaphorical heart broke as her paladin accepted to emptiness and pushed her away from his mind without breaking their connection.

Lance sat himself down on the floor and closed his eyes. He did nothing to stop the emptiness, encouraging it till there was nothing.

He saw nothing.

He heard nothing.

He tasted nothing.

He felt nothing.

He was nothing.

* * *

 

After a hour had passed the paladins were done ignoring the foreign feeling in their chest. They independently searched for each other hoping they could find the source of the unnatural feeling. Within a few minutes they found themselves outside of the training room. Well all of them besides Lance.

Pidge was the first to speak, "So, since the rest of us are out here does that mean Lance was the one causing that..  strange feeling?"

The rest of them shrugged. "Guess there's only one way to find out," Shiro said as he put his human hand on the door pushing it open.

Inside they found Lance sitting perfectly, no,  terrifyingly still. They couldn't even tell if he was breathing, let alone conscious. The air was heavy with the same strange feeling in their chest. The Lions were practically yelling in their heads for the paladins to go comfort their brother.

Hunk was the first to take a step forward, concern for his best friend and brother, pushing down knots in his stomach. He called out to Lance, and got nothing. He shook his shoulder gently and called out again. Still nothing. He tried again and again, his voice growing louder, desperate, pleading.

Still nothing.

The others joined Hunk around their brother, all of them calling out his name, shaking him desperately, and crying, until Lance did something, anything to show they weren't too late.

After what felt like an eternity of screaming and crying Lance finally responded. He scrunched his face up, possibly at the loud noise, and just this miniscule change gave the other paladins hope. Hunk held Lance tight against his body, while Shiro ran his human hand through Lance's hair coaxing the boy with a soft voice to wake up. Pidge desperately held onto Lance's left hand, pulling it close to her chest while Keith squeezed Lance's right hand with both of his.

They all watched in tense anticipation as Lance slowly came back, Shiro was the only one talking, hoping to guide their brother back to them.

 

Lance isn't sure what dragged him out of the emptiness that consumed him. Whether it was the desperate pleas of his siblings, or the painful shaking and squeezing on his body, or the warmth and concern that flooded in replacing the nothingness. And honestly it did not matter.

His siblings, whom Lance was sure wanted nothing to do with him, we're holding him close and tight. Hunk was pressed tightly against Lance's back leaving no room for anything else. Shiro's warm hand caressed Lance's scalp while his voice softly mumbled reassurances that could barely be understood. Pidge held his hand close to her, so close Lance could feel heart beat fast and hard in her chest. Keith's warm breath brushed against Lance's hand that was a bit wet.

Lance knew he scared his brothers and sister.  _ How? _ He is not sure, but he opened his heavy eyes and tried his hardest to smile to calm them. It worked a tiny bit, but they did not leave his side for the rest of the day and promptly ignored Allura when it was time for training.

The five of them sat in peace that was broken by Hunk whispering, "What happened back there Lance?"

The others didn't say anything but Lance could tell by the tightening of their jaw that they wanted to know too.

Unfortunately, all Lance could do was shrug. This didn't make them happy so he said, "I wasn't feeling too good today, so I let the um... I guess emptiness, consume me and next thing I knew you guys were here shaking me and screaming in my ear."

As he finished with a chuckle Hunk, Pidge, and Keith tightened their hold, somehow pulling themselves even closer to Lance. Shiro placed a soft yet sad kiss to Lance's forehead before resting his own there and they returned to peaceful silence, they decided they would talk about it again later. The purring of their Lions in their heads along with the warmth of each other physically and mentally being all they needed to feel more connected than ever, though this conversation was far from over.

Besides there is a beyond furious alien princess most likely storming her way over to them only to be shot down by the team, of four brothers and a sister.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to be honest I did not expect so many people to like this! Thank you for all of the comments, they really made my day.  
> I hope you all enjoy this chapter though I'm not sure how good it came out.

To say Allura was upset was an understatement. She was absolutely furious. Nothing Coran did could reach her as he pleads for her to listen to him. The poor man tried so hard to get the princess to calm down, even the mice attempted to aid in his fruitless attempt.

Unfortunately, nothing could stop her. It has been a stressful last few quintants, the last few battles with the Galra leaving the ship in need of repairs while also making it temporarily impossible to continue making allies.

So Allura turned her attention to the paladins in hopes of accomplishing something in this time of inactivity. Unfortunately, this did not stop the stress from piling up as the paladins easily grew tired and failed to live up to her expectations. So having the paladins, including Shiro, refuse to comply with her orders without a reason, it was too much.

As Allura bursts into the training, her anger wavers upon seeing the team all cuddle together. For a second she wants to figure out what is wrong and how to help her beloved paladins, but then it's gone.

A voice in her head screams,  _ "Do not forgive them! We are at war and you are their commander! We cannot allow them to believe this is acceptable! Your father would never make this mistake!" _

Allura shook her head and forced down the need to aid her paladins, "What in the universe do you think you are doing! I told you all when we finished training we would work with the lions! This is-"

" Allura.  Now is not the time. I am sorry but as a team, we have a lot that needs to be discussed." Shiro barely turned away from his brothers, his tone was firm yet soft.

Hard enough for Allura to understand that they were not going to listen to her. Enough for her to understand they all decided to blatantly ignore her for something that was not related to defeating Haggar and putting an end to the Galra tyranny. Certainly more than enough to warrant her reaction... right?

"That does not mean you can just  ignore  me! We are in the mi-!!" Coran placed a hand on Allura's shoulder jerking her back slightly to get her to stop. Before Allura could start lashing out at him though he spoke to the paladins who looked close to stabbing her with the nearest weapon.

"This seems to be a complicated situation so instead of bickering here, let's go to the "lounge room" as you paladins call it and have a calm discussion there."

Allura wanted to argue, to scream and shout, that no matter how you look at it, she is not in the wrong. That the paladins should not blatantly ignore her orders for any reason other than they are dying.

But she couldn't. She bit her tongue and forced a neutral expression on her face, "I agree with Coran. There you can give me a fully detailed explanation as to why you all ignored my orders." She turned away from the group and barely kept herself from stomping out of the training room.

"I cannot  _ believe  _ they did that!! I expect this kind of rude and in proper attitude from Lance but the others?! And Shiro defended them!! He was even a part of it!! If Father was here-"

"But he's not." Allura jerked around to face the ginger Altean, who stared back at her with a strong will. He walked up to her and looked her dead in the eye before continuing. "King Alfor is not here and these are not his paladins. You are here, Princess Allura. They are your paladins. You cannot expect them or yourself to behave in the same manner as them."

Allura wanted to rebuke. To tell him that her Father and the Old Paladins are what they should become, but the words died on her lips. So Coran continued. "These paladins did not train their whole lives to become Paladins of Voltron. They have not spent decapheebs and countless battles at each other's sides.  You have not spent decapheebs training with them. You barely know much about them as a species, let alone as people."

Allura bit her lip as she and Coran entered the "lounge" room. It could not be true, she knew her team better than anyone. "Th-that is not true Coran. I know them well enough to know that this behavior is not normal."

"Then you should know that they would never do something like this without a good reason. You did not even give them the chance to explain." Coran's frown was mixed with sorrow as he leads the princess to sit down.

Mixed feeling burned within the princess as she waited silently for the paladins to make their appearance.  _ They better have an explanation for all of this. _

* * *

Back on the training deck, the paladins have moved from their cuddle pile. A tense silence has them swallowed whole before anyone says anything.

"So how should we explain  _ this  _ to her?" Pidge shifted her weight as she and the other paladins shared nervous glances.

"W-well, I'm technically the only one who really knows what happened so I guess I should be the one to explain it." Lance shrugged curling in on himself. A strong sense of fear from her brother washed over Pidge pushing her to move closer to him at the same time Hunk did.

"That may be true but even you don't really know what happened." Keith had taken a step forward, his eyes and voice gentle as he sent a comforting warmth through the paladin bond. 

Lance scrunched up his face, "But still-"

"Lance. This is not your fault. Keith is right, none of us know what happened so we will all work together to understand it and make it right." Shiro brushes his human hand against Lance's cheek making him look up. "Allura is mad at all of us, so we will all explain to her the situation together."

Finally, Lance relaxes as he allows the warmth Pidge and their brothers to fill him. This immediately makes Pidge relax, courage and strength flowing from all of her brothers. After all, Shiro is right. Whatever happened we can get through it together.

The paladins leave the training deck closely together with Shiro and Keith a step -maybe less- ahead, Lance comfortably leaning on Hunk, who whispered encouraging words that Pidge could not hear, and Pidge in the middle.

When they entered the lounge they all sat together on the couch directly across from Allura and Coran.

Directly in the center, Lance took a deep a breath, support and unity flowed freely between the paladin bonds, and he began.

* * *

The blue paladin began telling his story with the day before explaining all of his mistakes and how everyone responded to them made his  self-confidence  weak. Allura could not comprehend how this had anything to do with them refusing to work with her. Besides, the very fact that the other paladins could feel this  _ "emptiness"  _ as he explains shows that their bond is still very much strong. So what is the issue?

"I wasn't sure how to explain the feeling to you all, and honestly didn't even want to try. I was tired of pretending it wasn't bothering me or that I was okay, so I just let it take over..." The blue paladin was staring at the floor as the other paladins moved closer to comfort him.

"We are so sorry we let you feel this way. As your oldest friend and closest brother," Allura frowned at the term the yellow paladin used. They were paladins, not brothers. "I should have been the first to notice something was wrong but instead I ignored it cause I was in a good mood. I'm so sorry."

The black paladin picked up where yellow had left off, "We are all sorry. It was not fair of us to ignore something so blatantly wrong for any reason."

The other two paladins showed sign of continuing this trend but Allura still did not have her answer as to why this was a problem in the first place. "I am glad you are all settling these personal issues but I still do not understand why this stopped you from training and is still cutting into a time we could be using to fight the Galra Empire."

The green paladin glared lasers at Allura but it was the red paladin that spoke up. "You may not have seen it Allura, but Lance was in no shape to train. We barely managed to pull him out of his depression so that we could let him know we were there for him. Making him train in that condition was practically begging for a bad day for all of us!"

Allura was about to fire back that training would have helped strengthen the bond to aid Lance out of his  depression  but the yellow paladin spoke up again.

"Listen Allura, us humans are very emotional creatures. If we are emotionally unstable then we are unfit to do anything. This mess would have only gotten worse if we had pushed it back to have training."

"That is no reason to ignore me without any warning!" Allura was reaching her limit, she could feel it. But she was a princess and must remain in control of her feelings at all times.

The black paladin is the one to respond this time, his voice tense but not upset. "You are correct, Princess, but at the time training was nowhere near as important as ensuring the safety of our brother. I will do better next time bu-"

"THERE WILL BE NO NEXT TIME!"

Everyone stared at Allura, bewildered by the outburst, even Coran but she could not stop. She would not stop.

"The Galra do not care if you are an emotionally weak species! They do not care if one of us is not feeling in tip top shape! You must be ready at all times to fight! They will not baby you and neither will I!  What happened today  will not be repeated. We are fighting a war and  no one is going to baby you. You are soldiers with a duty to the universe. You are paladins before anything else. Do you understand!"

There is a tense silence as all of the paladins glare up at her. A fire in their eyes that she has never seen directed at her before and it was a little more than unsettling. Something deep inside, along with the very shocked and very displeased look on Coran's face, told her she messed up. More so than ever before.

Then they were yelling. All at once, their voices blending in together. At some point, they were all standing and moving closer to Allura. What little she could hear burned into her mind along with the near deadly pressure from their voices. These were not the paladins she knew...

_ "We were not trained for war! We did not ask for this and honestly did not want to be apart of this!" -_ Green Paladin

_ "We already have the odds stacked against us so pushing us to our limits does not make us better! Instead, it makes us worse! Weaker!"-_ Red Paladin

_ "We can only do so much! Forcing us to be what we are not is just plain idiotic! We are not dumb nor are we blind! We know where we stand!" -_ Blue Paladin

_ "We weren't made to fight and think of only war for every waking breath! We need other things! We need to feel safe! To rest! To release stress! Maybe the old paladins could go years like this but we cannot and will not!"-_ Yellow Paladin

_ "We are not the old Paladins. We do not function the way they do. We can try all we want but we are not them . This is not a war we can win alone even if we tried. So stop trying to do the impossible and work with us instead of forcing us to do as you wish!" -_ Black Paladin

_ "Everyone, please! Calm down! L-let us end here today. Everyone is very stressed and tired so we will be doing no more training exercises till tomorrow... ... ... That was very foolish of you Princess. I already told you they are not the Paladins of old... I think it's time you start learning who they are rather than teaching them who they are supposed to be." -_ Coran

A voice floated in, long after the fight as Allura layer in her bed and whispered.  _ "Father would not have made such a grave mistake." _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as you could all see this is a more Allura centric chapter. Let me make this clear, I DO NOT hate Allura, I just believe she tends to put her duty and responsibilities first which leads to issues on how she sees the paladins. She stresses herself out trying to be like her father and making the paladins similar to the old ones. 
> 
> Anyways I accidentally made it so I have to write another chapter for it to feel complete. *cries*


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was a fun chapter to write. Took me 3 tries till I was satisfied but here we are!

The next day was tense and awkward. There was no planned breakfast that morning so when Keith went to eat he was alone. Not sure what to do with himself afterward he went to the training deck.  
  
As he made his way to the deck, he reached out for his brothers and sister through the paladin bond. Nothing felt out of the ordinary except maybe the varying amount out of apprehension towards what the princess has planned for today. Keith couldn't deny that even he was a little worried after all the princess is known to push harder and harder the more stressed she is.  
  
That being said Keith did not feel bad for what happened yesterday. She deserved it.  
  
Comparing them to the paladins of old, ignoring their issues and struggles, letting her personal beliefs cloud her actions. She's not perfect and that is fine, but sometimes it feels like she isn't trying to connect with us, to understand us...  
  
Keith groaned as he entered the training deck. Thinking so much has given him a headache. The best way to deal with it was to drown himself in exercise.Keith started on level 5 and worked his way up. He relied on his instincts as he fought using minimal thought while fighting, but a strange discomfort grew in his chest the more he fought.  
  
The red paladin handled it the way he handled anything that confused him. Fight first, question later. So he cut his mind off even more until the feeling was no longer bothered him.  
  
Soon he couldn't feel the burn in his limbs. Maybe he was pushing himself too far? Oh well, it didn't matter, Shiro and the others could always pull him out of it later.  
  
Then the taste of blood in his mouth faded away to nothingness, but he didn't let affect him. Though he did start feeling a bit worried when he could no longer hear the sound of him fighting or the bots falling to the ground but he couldn't stop fighting.  
  
Keith _wanted_ to be afraid. He wanted to stop fighting and call out for his brothers and sister. But he _couldn't_.  
  
His limbs were no longer listening to him, his voice failed him, and his emotions.... _they weren't there_. He couldn't feel anything, only the emptiness.  
  
As his eyesight faded he pushed on to his paladin bond in hopes someone will notice something is _terribly wrong_.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  
This time when the paladins felt the strange "empty" feeling in their bond they did not hesitate to find each other. Lance was a bit slow to join but he seemed the most confused and worried.  
  
The others were all prepared to find Lance hidden somewhere again, so they were all very confused seeing him completely conscious while the feeling grew stronger.  
  
"Wait if Lance is okay then where is the "emptiness" coming from?" Hunk was relieved his best friend was not in danger but fear for his other siblings replaced the relief in a second.  
  
The sibling between each other before Pidge spoke up, her voice laced with the fear following through the paladin bond. "Has anyone seen Keith?"  
  
The silence was painful as they all desperately thought to when they last saw their brother. Then they were running. Going down the halls as fast they possibly could. The feeling was getting stronger and more painful.  
  
Shiro took the lead followed closely by Lance with Pidge and Hunk barely a step behind. There were no questions on where Keith was. There were very few places he went to think and possibly release stress.  
  
On the way to the training deck, the group passed Coran who might have had something to say. Unfortunately, the Altean did not get a word in because they were on a mission. As they said before and will say however many times necessary, their family came first.  
  
  
  
  
On the training deck, Keith was still fighting. His clothes were tattered, his body bruised and bleeding but he did not stop.  
  
Shiro and Hunk called his name hoping he would stop so they could talk but he did not respond. Pidge ran to the observation deck to manually shut down the Gladiators. Lance stared at Keith, feeling the emptiness creep in, remembering the darkness and the fear he did not feel till he dreamt of that place in the safety of his bed.  
  
Lance remembered that he let the awful feeling swallow him but _how did Keith get caught while fighting? Why is Keith even experiencing this? Why..._  
  
Once Pidge had shut everything down Keith finally slowed to a stop. Shiro and Hunk ran to him as he fell. Lance couldn't bring himself to move. He watched as Shiro pulled Keith close crying with Hunk pleading for his brother to wake up.  
  
Pidge came down and pulled Lance to Keith. At first, he jerked back but he soon realized he needed to be there. In the tight group of warmth, sorrow, and fear. He needed to be there for Keith, Pidge, Shiro, and Hunk.  
  
Shiro held Keith's body close to him, holding on in fear that Keith slips through his arms. Hunk had one hand on Keith's shoulder and the other tightly gripping his hand while Pidge tightly grabbed Keith's other hand with both of hers. Lance ran his hand through Keith's mullet, pulling his head close, "Come back to us mullet head."  
  
They all whispered to their brother, begging him to come back, pleading for him to open his eyes, to jerk, to squirm any-

  
"Paladins I have come to apologize as you have all indirectly requested." All of them jumped slightly at the sudden intrusion. Allura was looking at the ground with the mice on her shoulder and Coran behind her.  
  
While the princess was completely unaware of the scene before her Coran stared in confusion that shifted into horror as his fell upon Keith. The mice, on the other hand, seemed to immediately understand the issue. Only when the mice moved to Pidge and Lance's shoulder and Coran moved to Hunk's side did Allura look up and take in the scene before her.  
  
The Paladins turned from back to the red paladin who laid unconscious in their arms, fear, and confusion radiated off the group as Allura took a few cautious steps forward.  
  
After a dobosh, the red paladin's uncharacteristically blank and pale face scrunched in discomfort and the other paladins let out strange sounds of happiness. Then they started coaxing him to wake up, Coran joining them after taking a second to understand what was going on.  
  
Allura, on the other hand, was far too lost to really comprehend what is going on.  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  
  
Keith was _terrified_. He didn't know where he was and he couldn't describe it either. Not cold, not hot, not comfortable, not cramped, not dark and not bright. It was nothing and it was terrifying.  
  
Somehow he recognized he was somewhere in his head but not knowing or understanding was unbearable. He wondered why Lance would willing come to such a strange and terrifying place.  
  
It wouldn't be as scary if he could at least feel his bond with his lion or his siblings but here he was completely and utterly alone. Until a small light shone in front of him. It was weak and Keith probably would have missed it if this place wasn't so empty.  
  
He didn't walk, or swim to it. He just moved towards the light or maybe it was growing bigger cause soon it was warm and completely pushed away from the emptiness.  
  
As the light consumed everything he could feel his sense coming back to him one by one.  
  
He could feel the pain in his limbs from fighting as well as hands caressing him and arms tightly squeezing his waist. He coughed and squirmed in discomfort from all of the pain and could feel the hands and arms loosen just a bit though they were still very painful.  
  
He could taste the blood in his mouth and he could feel how dry it had become. His throat hurt for no clear reason but God he was in so much pain.  
  
Then he could hear them. His siblings' whispers, the squeaks from the mice, and he could hear Red in his head.  
  
Red's purrs were a little too loud but Keith relished in the sound, ecstatic to no longer be alone.  
  
He hummed softly to his sibling in hopes to calm their frantic whispering and thankfully it worked. They let out sighs of relief before they continued much more calmly. Lance and Shiro's voices were the closest and the clearest, though Keith could not focus entirely on them. Pidge and Hunk were on his sides along with the mice. There was another voice... _Coran?_  
  
While hearing his siblings and Coran's voices did aid in Keith's fear it still wasn't enough. He needs to see them instead of this continuous darkness. He needed to know he wasn't just creating them in his mind and the squeezing on his body wasn't just bruises. He needs to see Shiro's smile, hear Lance and Hunk's laugh, to joke around with Pidge. He needs them.  
  
Keith forced his heavy eyelids open slowly. At first, it was still dark. Then color blurred in and slowly cleared and focused. The first person he saw was Lance followed by smaller less focused Hunk, Pidge, and Coran. They all looked down at Keith with soft concerned smiles.  Keith turned his head and followed the sound of Shiro's voice before he actually saw him right next to his face. His face was wet and red, his brow loosened up from its tight frown. He was definitely happy to see Keith more than anything.  
  
Keith was safe again. He was with his siblings and Coran. Away from the emptiness and the awful feeling that precedes it. Keith gave a weak smile and hum as he finally listened on to what his siblings were saying.  
  
_Welcome back, brother._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now Keith has experienced the "emptiness"
> 
> How did you guys like that? Surprised?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for like, just dropping off the face of the earth with this chapter! I swear I didnt mean to!
> 
> When I was first writing this chapter I didn't like the way I was going with it but I didn't know that then so it took me forever to write then my file got messed up and it was impossible to read so I had to rewrite the whole thing and I had no motivation to do it. Every time I started writing I just wanted to quit. 
> 
> Then just a few nights ago I finally felt compelled to complete this chapter and I also managed to find why I didn't like at first so I'm much more confident with this chapterm even though it may be a bit short. 
> 
> Anyways hope you enjoy.

Shiro carried Keith to the med bay bridal style so he could hold him close to his chest. Lance stood right beside the two in deep thought, occasionally glancing down at Keith's sleeping face. Pidge walked in front of them next to Hunk who was doing his best to explain the situation to Coran. Allura walked behind everyone, her face still pale from seeing a dead looking Keith.

Shiro himself was still confused by what had happened.  How on earth did Keith end up in this situation as well? He would never willingly give control to something he did not understand.  And more importantly,  Why was he still moving when the  emptiness  took over?  It just did not make sense. Granted, Shiro did not know a lot about what was happening but it was still very confusing, to say the least.

Shiro sighed as the group entered the med bay, Coran immediately went to prepare one of the pods. Shiro frowned along with Pidge who asked, "Why are you setting that up? Keith only has some bruises that will heal just fine on their own." Pidge crossed her arms while Shiro laid Keith down on one of the beds for the time being.

Coran did not turn around when he responded but his voice sounded confident. "The pod will be able to scan and pick up if there is anything physically wrong with Keith's body which may have caused all of this to happen."

Shiro was still skeptical of putting his brother in the pod and while he did not want to make Lance uncomfortable he had to ask, "If that is the case, why did we not put Lance in as well?" Lance frowned but did not turn away or to Shiro, so Shiro assumed he was not angry at the question.

Coran cringed in obvious displeasure, "You see we did not have information to safely put Lance in there and if it would be of any use-" 

"Just admit that you did not believe us when we told you what happened! Now it would be too late to see if it is still in his system!!" Pidge was livid, her small hands balled up in rage as her face turned red. "I thought at the very least you would be on our side Coran but I stand corrected."

Coran sighed and hung his head in regret. "You are correct number 5. I did not believe what you had all said in Lance's case because I could not determine how much of your story was dramatics. Now that I have experienced it for myself, however, I wish to fix my mistakes and ensure this does not happen to any of you again." 

Shiro could not stay mad at the sincere apology, but that didn't mean he had to forgive the old Altean just yet. "What makes you so sure it safe to put Keith in there now?"

"Yeah," Lance uncrossed  his arms and spoke for the first time since Keith showed signs of no longer being in the  emptiness 's grasp. "What happens if the  emptiness  gets to him again while in there?! He will be mentally cut off from the rest, so we will not be able to help him. What then?"

Coran hesitated, opening and closing his mouth, afraid to answer. Allura did not have the same issue as she answered for the other Altean. "Easy, should the  emptiness take over Keith, we do nothing. This will give the pod a chance to analyze what is wrong with his body and we can see if the pod can eliminate the foreign...  emotion for us."

Shiro felt his blood boil as Allura spoke, with complete disregard for Keith's well being. He barely suppressed a growl as he held Keith closer to him, barely noticing his siblings move to get between them and Allura. Instead, he was acutely aware of the confusion and fear that bloomed on Allura's face as Coran got between the paladins and his princess.

"Sh-she did not mean it like that! I mean yes, the plan is to let the pod analyze the situation to see if it could take care of it. But, should it prove too much we will know not to do it again and will try to get him out as soon as possible." 

Coran tried to soften the blow, to make it seem not as cruel as Allura put it. He tried, and Shiro wanted to give him that but it did not change what was said, because in the end. What they said was the exact same thing.

"I am sorry Coran, but I am not willing to put Keith through that. He is not even awake to decide for himself, yet you wish to treat him like a guinea pig? Not happening."

Pidge and Hunk voiced their agreement, dropping their protective stance just a bit. Lance on the other hand only nodded along, though he did drop his own protective stance.

Coran hung his head in shame. Shiro wanted to tell the poor Altean that he was not mad at him.

Allura still seemed lost and confused as to why they reacted so negatively. It just did not seem to make sense to Allura why putting Keith in the Pod could ever possibly be a bad thing. Shiro was not sure she would ever understand why they are slowly growing to dislike her...

* * *

Fortunately, talk of putting Keith in the Pod had stopped there. Keith was laid in one of the beds so he could properly rest.

Not wanting to sit in worry for his brother, Hunk left to make food, it was past their regularly scheduled lunch meal, and Lance had followed to make small talk. 

Pidge had left to fetch her laptop from Green's hangar and once they were all done they would meet back up in the med bay to eat and wait for Keith to wake up. Shiro had decided to stay by Keith's side while Coran did some quick check up procedures to ensure Keith was really alright. 

A minute after they all split up a spike of fear shot through their mental bond, almost making Hunk run back to the med bay in reaction, but the spike went away just as fast as it came and a wave of comfort a safety took its place.  The latter probably came from Shiro,  Hunk thought as he resumed cooking. 

There was a moment of silence before Lance filled the air with mindless chatter once again. It was barely considered peaceful as there was still the fear of the  emptiness  and the horrors that befall the person trapped in it.

Hunk desperately wanted to ask Lance more about what had happened when he was taken over, but it did not take a genius to know Lance did not want to talk about it again. However, that just made Hunk even more curious.  What made the experience so terrifying? For Hunk it was the strange feeling that ate away at his chest then the fear of knowing something had happened to his sibling,  but what about the other person? Lance was not afraid of the emptiness then, but now he refuses to talk about it. Keith was not afraid when it started, then he slowly became afraid, then he was no longer afraid. 

Hunk was afraid and could not deny it. He was afraid it would come for him next, or Pidge, maybe even attack Lance  agai - 

Fear.

Fear spiked through Hunk's system causing him to turn for the door, Lance right in front of him. The two ran down the hall, Lance's lanky legs carrying him faster though Hunk was not far behind. They went in the direction of the med bay but there was no clear destination in Hunk's mind, all he wanted to do was find his siblings and that need only grew as the fear stayed strong in his chest. 

As Hunk was about to turn the corner something half his size crashed into his back and latched on with a deathly grip. It took his brain a minute to register that it was Pidge, trembling and sobbing into his back. It was then he realized the fear was coming from her. 

As Hunk was about to call out to Lance, the latter was already running back with Shiro in tow to where Hunk and Pidge stood. Shiro and Lance spoke softly to her as they pried her off of Hunk. As soon as he was free, Hunk turned around and hugged his sister and brother as they a worked together to stop her crying.

While the cuddle was warm and felt safe, it was not complete. Keith's presence not being there was so strong that Hunk watched multiple times as they all looked to where the med bay expecting their brother to come running down the hall to help. As it started to become apparent that Pidge would not calm down unless Keith was there Hunk started to lose hope until he felt it.

He felt Keith as though he was right next to them mentally. Somehow, even in his unconscious state, Keith managed to find them and help comfort their sister. Pidge finally stopped sobbing and as she grew quieter Keith's presence began to fade.  It must have been tiring for him to do that,  Hunk thought 

Exhaustion hit them all like a truck, Pidge more than the others. Shiro lifted her in his arms and she hid her face in his chest. The sight pulled a whimper from Hunk's throat as he could not help but worry about his little sister. Shiro spoke softly, "I will take her to the med bay. You two make sure the food is not burnt and immediately come join us. I am not taking any more chances."

Hunk was too tired to argue. All he wanted to do was lay his brothers and sister and relax. He wanted no more reasons for fear or  emptiness to attack him and filled him like a glass of water. Lance must have felt the same as easily nodded his head and followed Hunk to check on the food. 

Neither of them made small talk as Hunk turned off the heat for the food and Lance helped finish the last of the preparations. They quickly did what they needed to do and made their way to the med bay to join the others.

As soon as they entered, Shiro got up, "Coran finished the scans for Keith and he should be waking up soon. So I figured it would be more comfortable in the living room. Do you two want to rest for a second in here or are you good to go immediately?"

Lance was the first to respond, "Might as well go now. I am not sure I will be able to stand back up if I rest now."

"I have to agree. My legs already feel like jelly, if I sit now I most definitely will not be getting back up."

Shiro laughed softly and moved to pick up as Lance grabbed Pidge. He whispered something softly to her before picking her up and did not actually pick her up till she shook her head. Then they made their way to the make shift living room. There they all got comfortable making small talk while they waited for Keith to wake up.

Hunk wanted to stay like this. To keep his brothers and sisters within arms reach, all of them sitting in peace away from danger both physically and mentally. Unfortunately, he knew this would not last much longer.

After all, they were Paladins of Voltron, Defenders of the Universe.

Something Allura would never let them forget for even a second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I told you all but I love your comments! Sorry, I never respond to them.
> 
> Also, I'm pretty sure this chapter is significantly shorter than the rest, which means a lot will be happening next chapter ;-)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, this chapter was hard to write. It took forever to figure out how I wanted to start it and gosh it was painful! But, I am glad I finally managed to type it all up. 
> 
> Also isn't it just amusing that this fic went from a one-shot langst fic to an all out multi-chapter angst fic? I'm so proud of myself.
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoy this long over due chapter!

The paladins sat on the couch curled around each other. Pidge and Keith sat in the middle of the whole group, Keith was still asleep while Pidge played with his hair distracting herself from her other brothers' silent questions that floated between the paladin bond. Both Keith and Pidge laid their heads on Shiro's chest as he was directly under. Lance was sitting next to Keith, running his hand through Keith's hair occasionally brushing his thumbs across Pidge's fingers and knuckles.Hunk was sitting next to Pidge, an arm wrapped her around her slim waist to protect her from whatever terrified her earlier.

Pidge loved the warmth and comfort that came from her brothers and tried to focus solely on that. Unfortunately, she was too anxious over what happened earlier to truly enjoy the moment. She and her brothers made a deal to wait till Keith woke up for her to tell her story. They understood that whatever had happened has put the usually confident Pidge off balance. 

The group sat in peaceful silence and until Keith began to squirm. Lance and Pidge moved to give Keith a bit of room while he stretched, blinking his eyes weakly turning to his brothers and sister with a small smile.

Shiro was the first to speak, "Good morning Keith." It was a soft whisper to not disturb the peace that was settled in the air. 

"Mornin'," Keith slurred as he rubbed his eyes. 

"How are you feeling," Lance asked.

Keith thought for a second before responding, "Sore with a killer headache."

Hunk let out an airy chuckle. "Well, that's not too surprising."

Keith groaned, "What happened, anyway? Why are we all cuddle up?"

Pidge bit her bottom lip and looked at Shiro, Lance was also looking to Shiro with a worried look. Shiro let out a heavy sigh, "How much do you remember before now, Keith?"

Keith made a confused groan, " 'M not sure... I think I was training..." We all stayed quiet while Keith sorted himself out, recalling all of the details almost painstakingly slow. "Then I got this weird feelin' in my chest... and my sense just kinda, died? Then there was nothing and it was cold... I was... scared? Yeah, I was terrified because... the feeling... the darkness... I was scared because..."

As Keith failed to fully find the answer, Lance decided it was time to help him, "Because you were swallowed by the _emptiness_?" Even though we all knew the answer, Lance still sounded unsure. Probably because he did not want that answer to be right and Pidge could not help but agree with him, but that would mean they had another problem and no one wanted that so she felt a tiny bit relieved when Keith agreed with Lance.

"Yeah... the _emptiness_..." Keith did not focus on that for long as he immediately tried to finish recalling what happened before. "It was cold and scary... for a long time... but then it was warm...." Keith smiled, "Like right now."

Lance sighed as he ran a hand through Keith's hair as Pidge sighed. Shiro calmly began explaining what happened while Keith was unconscious. "...we came in here to wait for you to wake up. Then Pidge will tell us what scared her." 

Pidge refused to look any of her brothers, not wanting to look at the worried stares even though she could already feel how worried they were through the paladin bond. She already knew there was not putting this off any longer. 

Pidge let out a heavy sigh as she began, "I was going to get my laptop, and I was distracted... I couldn't get Keith fighting out of my head. I was trying to figure out how  _emptiness_   was able to control him, what it even is and then I felt it." The air was tense as Pidge continued with a tremble. "The _emptiness_... it felt more like a person than an emotion."

Hunk held Pidge even closer, just barely not squeezing the life out of her. "But how? Lance and Keith both said it was emotion."

"Besides we have all felt  _ emptiness _ ," Shiro continued gripping Pidge's hand, "It is definitely an emotion-"

"I know, I know! It is strange but that's how it felt!! It felt like someone was creeping up! Then they wrapped a hand around me and I was terrified! I-I couldn't see anything b-but I knew it was there and e-even when I had run to you guys I could feel it! I-It wouldn't give up!" Pidge did not realize she was crying till Keith was wiping a tear from her cheek as she sobbed.

Pidge buried her face in Shiro's chest as her brothers cooed softly to her, apologizing to her and promising that things will get better. All of them held her close try to chase away the fear that has made its home in her chest once again, and Pidge did not stop them. She needs this more than anything.  _ How are Keith and Lance okay after experiencing something so terrifying?? I couldn't even handle a small dose of it and yet here they are, being strong for me... _

* * *

Coran was not sure how to act around the paladins anymore. Before it was simple, he would help guide them will giving them their space. Never too close yet never too far, and this method worked splendidly. At least, it did before. Now Coran was not so sure.

He knew there was little he fully understood about human relationships and mentalities, but he figured they were not too different from Alteans in many regards. But how they acted when he suggested putting the Red Paladin in the pod was not something he was prepared for. A little disagreement was expected, but for them to completely shut down the notion because the possibility of it bringing more pain than help was not.

So Coran preceded to convince Allura to leave them alone for the day, which she, of course, disagreed with. "We cannot continue putting off training because of some  emotion ," she said. "The Galra are still out there and every second they grow stronger!! Today will  _absolutely_   be the last day they refuse my orders, Coran. Make sure they understand that."

Coran sighed at the memory. Now he was making his way down the halls, already done with most of the check ups for the castle itself. He was determined to find the paladins and find a way to fix everything and return to the way it was before. 

Coran was not really prepared to find the paladins in a large pile crying on the couch. It hurt him to see them all so defenseless and visibly shaken up. A memory from after the paladins earlier missions came flooding in, _ "They are just children by our standards, Coran." _ Shiro had a look of untold sorrows,  _ "Just barely old enough for war. And now we are millions of light years away from everything they have ever known. So please, be patient with them. There is so much they are not prepared for." _

Coran did not think much of the request then, easily replying, _ "Of course my dear boy. Allura is just a child by Altean standards, so it will not be difficult!" _ Now Coran regrets not thinking further on what that means. Looking on the paladins, Coran knows that it meant more than dealing with their wild moods and temperamental issues. A sigh escapes the old Alteans lips as he leaves the paladins,  _ I will come back later and will talk to them about this  _ _emptiness._  

 

It was a few vargas before Coran returned and this time, the paladins looked exponentially calmer. Pidge was asleep on top of Hunk who was lost in his own world. Keith and Lance were quietly talking to each other, with Shiro listening in but not contributing. When Coran cleared his throat to get all of their attention, Shiro was the first to acknowledge him. "Yes, Coran?"

Keith and Lance immediately put their conversation on hold, and Hunk jerked out of his thoughts accidentally jostling Pidge awake as well. They all waited for Coran to speak, "I wanted to know what new information you all have on the  _ emptiness _ issue." They all cringed and quickly looked away. 

Like always, Shiro spoke up for the other children, "Unfortunately we have more questions than answers now. For Pidge the  _ emptiness _ resembled a living being attacking her, rather than a feeling like Keith and Lance said." Coran hummed as he walked further into the room. 

"Have you at least found out the conditions for when the _ emptiness _ will attack?"

Lance is the one to speak up this time, "Well the only thing all of our situations have in common is that we are alone and over thinking. And the only way to make the feeling go away is to be with each other." The other paladins nod along mutely.

"I see," Coran twirled his mustache in his fingers. The simplest solution was for them to never leave each other's side, but that would just be ignoring the problem. They need something more permanent, to truly rid them of their fear, but also something to help Allura and maybe even Coran to understand what was going on. Coran smiled a mischievous grin as he came up with the perfect plan. "Ok, I need you all to head down to the training deck, I have a plan!"

Unsurprisingly, the paladins gave Coran some skeptical stares but Coran did not back down as he puffed out his chest in pride. Shiro sighed as he pulled himself up, "Alright then. I will trust this plan of yours Coran, but you better be prepared to explain in full detail when we get started."

Coran beamed, "You have my word Black Paladin. Not that I would ever do anything that was not for the good of this team!"

Shiro chuckled as the other paladins rose from their seats to follow Shiro. Lance whispered to Coran, "Do you think your plan will work."

"At the very least it will help us understand what is happening and come up with a plan to defeat the _emptiness_ , " Coran responded truthfully. Lance accepted the answer and quickly left to catch up to the other paladins.  _ Now to get Allura. _

* * *

Getting Allura to join was the easy part, as she easily agreed when Coran said it would be a training exercise. The problem is the actual plan itself. Coran had everyone gathered on the training deck, the paladins on one side while Allura stood separately.

"So you will come train if Coran asks you, but refuse if  _ I _ do?" Allura was annoyed at how easily Coran managed to get them down here.

"For your information,  Princess. " Pidge said, "Coran told us to down here because he had a plan to help figure out what the  _ emptiness _ is." She had arms crossed as her brothers silently backed her up.

"What do you mean, _ "figure out what the emptiness is" _ ? It is an emotion as you all clearly stated before." Allura mirrored Pidge's stance, not showing if it bothered her that all of the paladins were against her.

"Well, it seems this is more difficult than we previously believed," Coran stated calmly as he walked in. Everyone turned their attention to the old Altean, questioning all of the mind meld sets he held in his hands. 

Allura was the first to speak, "What is the meaning of this Coran?"

"Yeah. You said you had a plan to deal with the  _ emptiness, _ nothing about a training exercise," Keith said.

"It is both," Coran stated calmly. "The mind melds will allow you to all go inside each other's head holes and see what the  _ emptiness _ is or at least what it is latching on to. Allura will be joining to see if it really is a chemical imbalance within your emotions or if it is something else. This will also give Allura a chance to see just what has you all so terrified. I will not be participating to ensure everything goes smoothly. Unfortunately, I am not sure what it is you will all be looking for so I will not be of much help in that regard. Any questions?"

As Coran was speaking, he passed out all of the mind melds and began setting up the tech for the exercise. The paladins were okay with the plan as it ensured none of them would have to deal with the  _emptiness_   alone. Allura on the hand had some disagreements.

"Coran exactly why must I do this with them? I have no trouble handling my emotions."

"That may appear to be so Allura, but as a leader, you need to be able to understand what your paladins are going through. It is also quite possible you are affected by this  _ emptiness _ as well and you are either hiding it or you are completely unaware of it. Either way, you doing this will hopefully fix the rift between you and the paladins." Coran said as he finished setting everything up.

Coran turned to the children standing before him, his face serious and determined. "Now are you all ready to do this?"

The paladins eagerly nodded, putting the mind meld helmets on and sitting in a circle with an opening for Allura to join in. Allura took a deep breath as she joined the paladins. 

They grew quiet as they all focused on each other and slipped into a whole new world that they had never seen before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does that count as a cliffhanger??? Oh well, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and I hope it made sense, but man this chapter was really hard to write...


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the inside of the paladin's heads. Hope you enjoy your stay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am honestly so sorry it took me so long to write this. For some reason, every time I tried to write it felt wrong and messed up. So, after a lot of trials, I have finally managed to create this work of art (honestly it's probably not even that good) but I do know for sure it is long. The longest of all of my chapters. I hope it's not too messed up or crazy because it gets weird this chapter... Anyways, I hope you all like it. <3

Lance woke up in a large field, filled to the brim with colorful flowers, stretching far out into the distance. The sky was a clear and beautiful blue with not a single cloud in the sky. The scene stole Lance's breath away, as he wanted nothing more to do than relax and enjoy the peace he struggled to find in the castle. Just as he was relaxing in the impossibly soft grass, Allura started yelling, completely shattering the peace.  
   
"Get your lazy butts up!" Lance and his siblings let out a groan, _even Shiro!!_ , as they all sat up from where they were laying. Allura continued, "Quit complaining. We need to finish this up quickly so we do not leave the castle undefended to long."  
   
Shiro was the first to his feet. While he helped Lance and the others up to their feet he said, "Do not worry so much Allura. The castle is hidden by the surrounding planets, and Coran can handle himself for a while." Once everyone was on their feet, Shiro turned to face Allura who was trying to keep her frustrations from showing on her face. "Besides, we have no idea what we are trying to accomplish here, so finishing this up quickly is not an option." Shiro turned from Allura to address his brothers and sister. "Okay team. For now, we are going to decide on which direction to go. Then we will make a plan based off of that."   
   
A quick look around and nothing seemed to scream, _"Go this way!!!"_ So Lance sighed and looked to Keith to make a joke but Keith was staring off into the distance. Never, in the little time, they have personally known each other has Lance ever seen Keith so, terrified. Keith's already pale skin was somehow even paler and his eyes were wide with fear and horror. Lance followed his gaze and immediately understood why his brother was so terrified.  
   
Far in the distance was what Lance could only describe as black clouds. The ominous clouds that blanketed the sky sent shivers down Lance's spine, making his legs tremble under the invisible pressure. Suddenly it became hard to breathe as each breath was heavy and burned his chest.   
   
Lance wanted to scream, to cry, to run away, as far and as fast as his legs could take him. To take Keith even farther away from those clouds and what they represent. To never let Hunk, Shiro, and Pidge get any closer than they already were. To drag Allura as far away from those damned clouds as possible.   
   
Even so, Lance knew. He knew that those demonic clouds were where they needed to go.  
   
"Hey, how about we go to those clouds over there," Pidge said. Lance wanted to turn to her and list all of the reasons why they should not go, but the fear of letting those clouds out of his sight was far too strong. Pidge continued, "They are the only things that stand out."  
   
"Sounds like a good idea." Of course Shiro agreed. Neither of them knew. "Anyone find anything else?"  
   
"Nope," Hunk said.  
   
"Not a thing," said Allura.  
   
"Great, then that is where will go," Shiro said. Lance wanted to cry. He did not want to go to the clouds. He did not want to be near those clouds. He would rather go back to the real world empty handed and go to those clouds. But those clouds are exactly what everyone is looking for. They hold at least a few answers.   
   
Lance knew that it was best to go to the clouds, but he did not want to. He did not want to go through that hell again. Even so, he bit his tongue and held his breath as they began making their way to the clouds.  
   
 

* * *

  
   
Lance and Keith did not say anything as the group walked to the gray clouds. They were still staring at the clouds for some reason. Both of their faces were deadly pale and the longer everyone walked through the green field, the harder of time they seemed to have to breathe. Hunk knew something was wrong with them, yet neither of them said a thing, not even to each other. It was not normal, and Hunk needed to fix it, starting with the source of the problem.   
   
"Shiro?" Shiro turned to Hunk giving Hunk his full attention as they walked. "I think we should stop and force Lance and Keith to tell us what is wrong. Neither of them has said a thing this whole time even though there is clearly something wrong with both of them." Shiro bit his bottom lip as he looked back at the subjects of the conversation.  
   
Hunk knew Shiro was trying to be considerate of their space, all of them were, but enough was enough. At this rate, one of them will collapse from fear. Shiro sighed, reaching the same conclusion as Hunk. "Let's stop here," Shiro said loudly enough to startle Lance and Keith from their thoughts. Shiro turned to them with sad eyes. "Keith, Lance, please you need to tell us what is on your minds."  
   
Keith and Lance's eyes both went wide, glancing from the clouds to Shiro erratically but they still kept their mouths shut tightly. "Please, we know something is bothering you two. Please tell us so we can help," Hunk pleaded, almost willing to get on his knees if it meant getting anything out of them.   
   
Lance stopped his erratic glances to stare at Hunk, then at Keith who returned the stare, then they looked back at Hunk and the others. Lance was the one to open his mouth but it took a few tries before anything came out. "D-do you seriously not know why?"  
   
The question confused Hunk and the others. _If we did, we would not be asking!_ But before Hunk could say anything Keith spoke up, "Doesn't something seem," he paused looking up at the clouds, still a good distance away, " _off_ about those clouds to you guys?"  
   
Pidge and Allura looked up to the clouds with confused faces. "They look like regular storm clouds. The only thing that could be considered weird is that they are a dark gray." Hunk frowned at her description of the clouds. Sure Pidge was not much of an artistic person but the clouds Hunk saw were clearly not dark gray.   
   
"Those clouds are not dark gray Pidge," Hunk said looking back at the clouds. "They are just a regular gray."  
   
Pidge frowned, "No they are dark gray. I know that for sure."  
   
"I agree with Pidge," Shiro joined the debate. "They are dark gray, borderline black."  
   
"No, I would not say borderline black, just dark gray," Pidge argued.  
   
"Are they, not a mixture of all of those colors?" Allura joined in, more confused than anything.  
   
"No. They are just a solid gray," Hunk said.  
   
"Like I said they-" Pidge was cut off by Lance.  
   
"Wh-what are you all talking about?" Lance and Keith stared at the others in bewilderment, Lance's voice trembled with every word. "Those clouds are black. Not gray, dark gray, borderline black, or mixture. It is pure black. L-like a black hole or something!"   
   
Hunk was taken back and looked back at the clouds that were still a normal shade of gray. "Wait, does this mean we are all seeing different things?"  
   
Allura shrugged, "It is possible. We are still technically in our own minds, we are just experiencing the same things, so the finer details probably differ between each one of us." That made sense to Hunk, but now he was curious as to what everyone else was seeing. Allura started talking again but this time to Keith and Lance, "Do not tell me you two have been acting like this because the clouds were black?"  
   
Keith looked like he wanted to yell at Allura but stopped himself. The Keith Hunk knew was prideful even when he was wrong, so Hunk nearly jumped out of his skin when Keith hung his head as if he was terrified to even say anything. Even Lance looked like he wanted to say something but did not.  _There has to be more to this, that the rest of us are not seeing. There is no way those two are afraid of the color of some clouds, that is just part of it._  
   
Luckily, Hunk was not the only one who realized how foolish of a thought that was. "I don't think so Allura," Shiro said. "There has to be more to it, right?" Lance and Keith fidgeted as everyone looked at them. Hunk did not want to make them uncomfortable, but he had to know what was up with them.  
   
This time Keith spoke up, though he sounded unsure. "There is more..." No one spoke, waiting for Keith to elaborate. "You see, the clouds are..."  Keith hung his head low, hi whole body trembling even as Lance holds his hand, "Dangerous. They are most definitely the physical form of the  _emptiness_ and I am terrified to go closer."  
   
Hunk was at a lost for words. Yes, the clouds seemed weird and gave off a weird feeling, but for them to be directly connected to the _emptiness_? It just seemed impossible.  
   
"Wait!" Pidge shook her head frowning. "If those clouds are our minds physical form for the  _emptiness_ how come they are all different colors? And I am going to assume that the feeling they give off is different too, considering how you two look like you are watching each others death in slow motion, while the rest of us are perfectly find, if not, just a bit uncomfortable. Also, if the clouds are the physical form of then isn't it a good thing we are head towards them no-"  
   
"Pidge," Shiro cuts off Pidge's ramblings firmly before turning back to Lance and Keith. "Why did you two keep this from us? We are a family. There is no need to hide what you are afraid of from us." Shiro was genuinely saddened that Keith and Lance seemingly did not trust them and, in all honesty, so was Hunk.  
   
Keith and Lance were quick to tell them that this was not the case. "No Shiro! It's not that we did not trust you guys!" Lance looked like he was about to cry as he explained. "It was because we know we have to go there to get the answers we need! If we had said anything we would have tried to convince you guys to not go towards the clouds so we choose to stay quiet!" Keith nodded along the whole time Lance was speaking, still sparing glances up to the clouds. "We did not want to ruin this. Me and Keith will be fine. Lets just continue."  
   
Hunk did not buy that last bit for even a second and knew the others did not either. "Lance, we are in this together. If something is hard for you we need to compromise, not ignore the problem."  
   
Shiro put a large hand on Hunk's shoulder, "Hunk is right. We came here to fix this together. We cannot hide anything from each other anymore. So I need both of you to promise that you will tell us if it gets harder for you to keep going."  
   
Lance and Keith look back to the clouds, before finally saying something. "We will Shiro."  
   
With that the whole group continued on the treck to the clouds. Lance and Keith were still watching the clouds cautiously, but they at least did not look like they were going to drop dead any second. Pidge and Allura discussed the differences in the things they saw.   
   
Hunk tried to convince himself that everything was fine now and they will get through this together just fine. But something did not sit right in Hunk's stomach. Looking at the clouds now, they did look a bit darker than just gray...  
 

* * *

 

  
As the team walked, everyone sticked close together, making the clouds less threatening. Allura was still keeping her distance, but Keith couldn't bring himself to care as both of his arms brushed up against Shiro and Lance. It was still hard to breathe and Keith could not pull his eyes away from the cloud for more than a second, but it was more bearable surrounded by his brothers and sister.   
   
The closer they all got though, the more alive the clouds became. Keith watched in horror as the clouds moved forming vague shapes and figures. Keith's first thought was to confirm what he saw with Lance, but the brunette was busy being distracted from his fears by Hunk and Pidge. So Keith turned to Shiro, who looked exhausted, and whispered, "Shiro."  
   
A heavy sigh followed by, "Yes Keith?"  
   
"Did you see the clouds move?" Shiro frowned and looked back at the clouds before turning back to Keith.   
   
"No. Did they do something?"  
   
Keith bit his lip feeling stupid, "No... but this whole time they have not moved and well now it's making all these strange shapes and figures..."  
   
"I think you are overreacting, Keith," Allura said. Keith frowned at her rudely inserting herself into the conversation. "It is likely we just have been too far away to notice till now."  
   
Shiro threw her a glare, as Keith turned back to the moving clouds. "But if that's the case would we not all see them moving?" Hunk asked cautiously, looking at the clouds.  
   
Pidge nodded, "We would, but those clouds are not moving for me. They are perfectly still. Though the color of the clouds has gotten darker, now border lining black. Are they moving for you Lance?"   
   
Lance nods, staring out the clouds in confusion. Keith turned to the clous and watched as they began forming... something. It was impossible to tell, and Keith was so focused on it he did not realize Shiro was asking him, "Do you want to rest here Keith?"  
   
"Huh? Uh, no. I'm good." Keith said quickly.  
   
"How about you Lance?"  
   
"I'm still good. No worse than before. The clouds are just being weird thats all." Lance never taking his eyes off of the form the clouds were making. Allura started walking once again quicky followed by the rest of the team.   
   
The closer they all got, the others started noticing the changes in the clouds. Everyone said the clouds were getting darker and darker and started shape shifting, but at this point, the clouds have taken on a definite shape for Keith. They had created an exact copy of Red. Keith did not bother saying anything because the others will see it once they were closer -as they did with everything else.   
   
Keith did his best to ignore the tightening of his chest, the wobbling in his legs, and the shortness of his breath at the sight of a black Red in his head. He tried to ignore the enormous pressure from being so close to the clouds. It was just as bad as when Keith had first saw the clouds, like he was alone despite being right next to his brothers and sisters. Keith could not stop his trembling hand from gripping Shiro's arm, but refused to say anything as his brother gave him that confused stare. Luckily Shiro let it go instead of making a deal about it.  
   
Keith tried to turn his attention to Lance to distract him from the fake Red, it only worked for a moment. Lance was listening in on Hunk and Pidge's conversation about what the clouds were forming, while watching the clouds out of the corner of his eye, holding Hunks hand in a death grip.   
   
Keith had assumed the clouds were changing into their Lions as his did, so he was thrown off guard as he heard Pidge say, "-humane like... it almost looks like my brother..."  
   
"What?" Keith turned his full attention to Pidge who gave him her own. "The clouds look like your brother?"  
   
"Yea," she pointed at Hunk, "For Hunk they're his mom. What does it look like for you?"  
   
Keith looked back at the clouds, "They look like Red..." Now everyone was staring at him.  
   
"Mine's my older sister," Lance said.  
   
"Mine's look like my father," Allura commented. More to herself than anyone else.  
   
"Mine's a lot more vague. It does not look like anyone," Shiro said as he stared at the clouds.   
   
"Still?" Pidge rubbed her chin in thought. "But the rest have had ours fully formed for a while..."  
   
At this point, they were all practically under the clouds. Keith felt the fake Red stare him down like easy pray and gulped. On both sides, Shiro and Lance were trembling from being so close to their own cloudy, more like misty as the clouds floated close to the ground, figures.   
   
The black mist wrapped itself loosely around Keith's whole body making him tremble. It was cold and heavy, too thick to see through or breathe properly in. Keith turns to say something to Shiro but the words die on his tongue as he no longer feels Shiro next to him.   
   
Panic shoots through him as he calls out for his brothers and sister, but he can't hear even his own voice. The mist held his limbs down, forcing him to look up at the fake Red. It leaned in opening its jaw to consume him, and Keith wanted to scream. He wanted to fight the mist off, to save his brothers and sister, to run as far away as possible, to go back to the real world and hold them close, to go back in time and convince them to have never come towards the clouds, to the emptiness.   
   
A stray tear slipped down his cheek as Red swallowed him taking away everything.  
   
There was nothing to see. There was nothing to hear. There was nothing to taste. There was nothing to smell. There was nothing to feel.   
   
Keith let out a choked sob,  _It is alive... and it has stolen everything from me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhangers!! I never knew I would be writing you into this chapter! 
> 
> Oh well. SO how do you guys like it? The emptiness is very much alive! Now I am sure you all have more questions but those pertaining to the emptiness will be answered in due time! For now please comment and tell me how you enjoyed this Chapter~ <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, I am SO sorry it took me forever to write this chapter!
> 
> I really did not mean to take this long, gosh writing is just so hard and I had no idea how to go about writing this. Like sheesh!
> 
> Anyways, it's here now for those of you still reading this! And well... it's sad. Not gonna lie I kinda made myself tear up at that one part ( you'll know what I'm talking about when you get there.) 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy! <3

Allura crumpled from the painful pounding in her chest because of the sight before her. Her beloved father, a shadowy figure that loomed far above her head. For years Allura worked to control her body and posture in order to make the perfect Princess, yet now her body trembled uncontrollably. Fear sinking into her bones as another feeling wrapped around her limbs making it impossible to move.

Allura never believed the paladins when they insisted that an emotion could physically control them. _If they could be controlled bony their own emotions how could they expect to defeat the Zarkon and the Galra Empire? Then using it as an excuse to completely ignore her and do as they please._ At least that was what she kept telling herself, not sure what else to make of their actions.

_ Why did I not believe them _ _..._ Allura cried, finding it hard to breathe despite, no, because of the empty feeling in her chest. The figure of her father reached down and grabbed her, engulfing her in the darkness. 

She could no longer taste the salt of her tears or even feel them down her cheeks. There was nothing to see, feel, or hear. The longer she spent in the awful state, the more she gave in to it. She began to lose hope on ever leaving the ghastly grasp of the darkness. 

_ Allura!! Princess Allura!!! _

A faint voice through the void. Allura did not believe it was real at first, created by the void to tease her consciousness but that did not make sense considering the darkness seemed intent on leaving her completely alone. 

_ Please, Allura!! You have to get up!! I-I cannot lose you too! _

Allura lifted her head to see where the broken voice came from. The only thing there was a small pure weight light. Allura moved towards the light, following the voice that resembled Coran's. As she drifted towards the light she began to regain pieces of her self, connecting back to her physical body. The freezing of the tips of her toes and fingers, they painful weight that sat on her chest, and the warmth from the arms that held her a bit too tightly. 

Allura groaned softly as she regained consciousness, the bright light burning her eyes while the noise made her ears ache. She could hear multiple voices but could not tell who was who as they all buzzed around in her head. 

Allura grabbed onto the fabric of Coran's shirt as she tried t o clear her head, slowly being able to make out what everyone was saying and see everything around her. Pidge and Hunk were crying and speaking very loudly, while Keith and Lance laid motionless on the floor. Shiro was sitting up facing away from the other paladins looking paler than normal. 

"Allura? Can you hear me?" Allura turned her attention to Coran and nodded in response to his question. "How are you feeling," he continued, but Allura could only groan as her head still ached with a pulsing headache. 

Pidge and Hunk's cries did not help the problem at all. Rather it made it worse and worse as Allura began pushing Coran away for some sort of silence.  _ Why are they yelling, _ Allura cringed as Pidge let out another uncharacteristically loud wail.  _ Shut up, Shut up, _ Allura could not handle the pain in her head and was desperate to get rid of it... _ Shut up,Shut up,Shut up,  ShutupShutupShutupShutup _ _,_   to the point that she blew up.

"SHUT UP!!" 

The room was completely silent at last, but the pain refused to leave.

"They are not dead and even if they were, screaming like that would have done nothing!! So shut up and start acting like proper paladins instead of like tantrum throwing children!!"

Allura's head was still pounding but at least it was finally silent. Now Allura could focus on what happened in that strange place in their shared heads and how to deal with the  emptiness.

"..the hell?"

Allura turned to the yellow paladin spoke, his face red with tears streaming down his cheeks. He had an expression Allura rarely ever saw on the usually gentle paladin. It was fury.

"Who the hell do you think you are telling us how to act when  our brothers are trapped in their own heads fighting the _emptiness_   for the second time!"

Allura new immediately that she made a mistake she was not going to be able to recover from.

"We know they aren't dead you selfish bitch!" Pidge was just as red and furious as Hunk, but she looked ready to kill Allura with her own hands while Hunk preferred to glare at her until she dropped dead. " But, we also know that they are suffering far more than any of us have!! SO YOU CAN SHUT THE HELL UP WITH YOUR APATHETIC ASS AND-"

"Pidge." Shiro cut her off with a hand on her shoulder and a firm tone of voice. He was still pale and shaking but more than ready to fight along his siblings. "We will deal with her later. Right now let's focus on Keith and Lance." He sent a glare at Allura with a pretty clear meaning.

_ Get out and do not come back. _

Coran also got the message as he pulled Allura out of the room as quickly as he could. 

* * *

Pidge followed Allura with a glare until the princess was completely out of sight. When she turned around, Hunk and Shiro were moving Keith and Lance to a more comfortable position. "Why did you stop me, Shiro," she asked as stomped around the room, her blood still boiling. "She was lucky I did not pull my bayard out on her! I was going easy by only yelling at here and you know it!!"

"I am also confused Shiro," Hunk said as he moved Lance next to Keith who was moved by Shiro. "What she said was unforgivable and uncalled for, so why did you let her get away with it?"

Shiro groaned as he rubbed his eyes, "I did not let her get away with anything. Like I said, Lance and Keith are more important than anything she says at this point." Hunk and Pidge nodded along thinking that was all, but Shiro continued. "Besides, what she said was not entirely wrong."

" WHAT?!"  They both yelled.  _ How could Shiro agree with that she-devil, _ Pidge thought but stayed silent as she waited for Shiro to continue.

"She was right in saying that screaming would not solve anything. We already know the only way to get rid of the _ emptiness _ , even if only temporarily, is by being open with each other. To give Lance and Keith the warmth and security needed to chase away the  _emptiness_.  Yelling at Allura, or yelling in general, would have made that impossible." Pidge hanged her head in shame. Pidge did not like the thought of admitting Allura was right but it seemed she had no other choice. 

"So," Shiro grabbed Pidge, and Hunk's hands pulling them out of their separate pity parties. "Let's take this moment now to focus on being a family and saving Keith and Lance from the  emptiness.  I promise we will deal with Allura later. Right now family comes first."

Pidge bit her bottom lip as she listened to Shiro. She wanted to attack Allura now, and make her pay immediately, but she already knew what to do. She glanced at Lance and Keith's paled complexion's and gave a heavy sigh. 

Neither she or Hunk had to say anything for a soft smile to spread across Shiro's face. "Now come on you two," Shiro said waving them over to their sleeping brothers. "Let's get to work."

Pidge sits down first as Hunk moves Lance and himself to her left, Shiro and Keith on their right. While at first, it was uncomfortable because Lance and Keith were so terrifyingly cold, but slowly warmth bled through not only their bodies but also the bond. _Shiro was right. this was much more important._

* * *

"Why did you do that?" Coran asked softly while pacing back and forth in Allura's room. They had been in there for a few minutes which Allura greedily used to regain her bearings before Coran had said anything. Even his voice was so soft Allura barely heard it the first time.

Allura huffed, "What I said was true Coran. Lance and Keith are not going to die and their screaming only made matters worse." She rubbed her head as Coran stared down at her, his eyes gleaming with unshed tears.

"Could you not have tried to say it gently? Or at the very least not as blunt?" Coran's voice was strained as if he was in physical pain from having to ask this of her.

"My head was aching too much for me to try and think of any other way," Allura rested her head in her hand which was propped up on her knee. "Besides who's to say they would have listened to me if I did? I had to get them to quiet down somehow."

"THAT DOES NOT MAKE WHAT YOU SAID RIGHT!" Coran's voice was raw as he screamed at Allura making her go rigid. "HUMANS ARE SENSITIVE CREATURE!! I THOUGHT YOU WOULD KNOW THAT BY NOW, QUIZNACK!" Coran turned away taking in heavy, shaky breaths in an attempt to compose himself, as tears streamed down his cheeks freely. He did not turn back around as he continued, "You cannot just expect them to move on from something so terrifying, Allura. Even more so because it involved the people they call family."

Coran was still crying as he turned back around to face Allura, with hurt and scared expression, his shoulders trembling. "You do not understand how terrifying it is to see them in that state... When you all dropped to the ground I was sure you were all dead... I was so terrified when you would not respond to anything I did... I thought I lost you Allura, I-I was so scared. Quiznack."

All Allura could do was watch Coran wipe the tears from his cheeks as he continued to sob softly. She was struggling to process everything, how she inadvertently hurt the closest thing she had to family. Someone she could always depend on. 

Allura hanged her head in shame as she thought about her words earlier had hurt the paladins, how cruel of her it was to make them suffer. She got up and pulled Coran into a tight hug. He immediately hugged her back, squeezing Allura like she was his life line, crying into her shoulder. Allura felt the guilt pool in her stomach along with the same feeling the  emptiness  gave her. 

_I am so sorry_ , Allura only wished she had the courage to say it out loud.

* * *

It took what felt like a million hours before Keith and Lance woke back up.

They both woke up crying, sobbing quickly grabbing onto Pidge as she was the easiest thing to grab. Hunk and Shiro calmed them down while rubbing Lance and Keith's backs respectively, while Pidge tried to not focus and the few intelligible words Lance and Keith mumbled. Pidge wanted to cry, but she wasn't sure if it was because her brothers were safe, or if it was because of the hell they suffered at the hands of the  emptiness . 

They sat there for even longer as Lance and Keith calmed down. Once they were calm, Hunk had mentioned food and they all made their way to the kitchen. It was a nice distraction from everything that happened just a few hours ago. Pidge had no interest in thinking back on any of it for the rest of the day. Luckily the rest of the castle agreed, even Allura.

_Don't think about her_ , Pidge shook her head as she tried to focus on a story Lance and Hunk were telling from their time in the Garrison.  _ We will deal with her later. For now, let's focus on my beloved brothers. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, there was a whole lot of yelling this chapter, huh.
> 
> It probably was not that clear, but yes the 'emptiness' is alive inside of them, including Allura. Next chapter I promise we will get more answers (hopefully) I really don't know why I am dragging this out.
> 
> Once again thank you for reading! I really love you all <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it has taken so long everybody! School has been a bit stressful these past few weeks and writer's block was a bitch lol.
> 
> Well, I hope you all enjoy this chapter I have written and it makes up for the long wait!
> 
> I am very positive those of you have been dying for more information are going to be very pleased with this chapter. Also, them going into their mind space will be referred to as the experiment this chapter, just not to confuse anyone.

Lance had expected for Allura to try to be quick about getting them all back on task. If what little Pidge and Hunk had told him about what happened after the experiment failed was anything to go by, both Coran and Allura would be anxious to get to work quickly. Neither went into much detail and obviously tried to avoid some specific points but Lance didn't bother to ask what it was.

 

So Lance wasn't surprised that they didn't get much time to relax.What Lance was surprised about though, was how much his brothers and sister -excluding Keith- fought back when Allura came down to get them.

 

Shiro refused to let Allure get so much as one word in while Pidge chased her out, threatening to beat Allura with her bayard. Hunk completely ignored her existence, refusing to look back at Allura or questioning what Pidge was yelling about. 

 

If Lance wasn't so confused, he would have found the whole thing amusing, but they all stopped when Coran asked them to come up to the med bay. Pidge stopped attacking Allura, but she stood between Allura and her brothers as if to protect them. Hunk pretty much carried Lance, who refused to admit how weak he still was from the experiment. Shiro carried Keith, and while Keith didn't fight it, he too refused to admit how tired he really was. 

 

In the med bay, Coran was hard at work on a projection of some bug like thing. Hunk sat Lance down and Coran said, "There is a lot to discuss, so get comfortable."

 

"Did you find something from the experiment," Shiro asked as he sat Keith down next to Lance and Hunk. Pidge stayed standing between Allura and the rest of them while Allura sat down a large distance away from Lance and her brother. 

 

"That I did. But first, Keith, Lance, how are you two feeling?" Lance smiled softly hoping to erase the pained expression on Coran's face before throwing his head back with an over exaggerated groan. 

 

"Awful, but I'll manage so long as we don't go fighting some Galra anytime soon." Lance smiled to himself as he made Coran and his siblings giggle softly.

 

"Honestly, my head is killing me and all I want to do is sleep." Keith groaned but he smiled at the laughter from his brothers and sister. Lance couldn't believe Keith basically made the same joke as him. 

 

"Saaaaaame" Lance whined making everyone laugh a bit harder. Lance loved the warm and happy atmosphere and decided he would do anything and everything to protect it. So that none of his siblings, or himself for that matter, had to suffer at the hands of the emptiness.

 

Allura cleared her throat, immediately killing the light mood. "We should get back on track about the... _emptiness_." Thick tension filled the room as Pidge and Shiro glared at Allura, and for the first time Hunk acknowledge her with a glare as well. Lance groaned internally but tried to keep his expression blank, similar to Keith's, though his was more of a dissatisfied frown than anything else. 

 

Coran sighed, "Yes we should." Everyone turned their attention back to Coran, but Keith gave a questioning glance to Lance who shrugged in response. 

 

"This," Coran said as he gestured to the holographic projection of a bug, "is a parasite native to Emosíe, called the emosékontrolí."

 

"Isn't Emosíe the planet we went to before Lance's incident?" Pidge asked. Hunk nudges her hard as Lance bit his lip trying to force down the memories that came flooding back at the mentioning of the incident. Where all of this trouble had started, and he foolishly dragged all of his siblings down with him. Keith put his hand on Lance's knee but did nothing else silent supporting Lance.

 

Lance took a shaky breath and tried to give Pidge a confident smile when she apologized but he knew it was far from confident. The tension increased even more as Allura cleared her throat once more to urge Coran to continue. This time no one bothered glaring at her this time.

 

Coran cleared his throat and continued, "That is correct Pidge. And while we all know the Emosíenens are a peaceful civilization, these parasites are far from it. They latch onto a hosts body and feed off of the negative emotions and cause illusions of sorts. At least that is what they used to do. Things are clearly different now compared to then considering our current situation."

 

Hunk's grip on Lance's shoulder tightened as Shiro asked Coran, "So we are going back to Emosíe?"

 

Coran turned to look at everyone, "Yes, but I plan to be the only going down to speak with the Emosíenens. I have had the least amount of contact with the emosékontrolí, which will limit the growth of their control. With that said, Keith and Lance. You two are not allowed down there for any reason."

 

Shiro and Hunk nodded along while Pidge said, "Don't worry Coran. We will make sure they don't set foot down there." Keith and Lance just sighed, knowing it would be pointless to argue against their siblings. 

 

"But what should we do if you get into some trouble?" Lance was a bit surprised when Allura showed genuine concern for Coran but figured he shouldn't considering they were the last Alteans in this reality, and the older Altean has supported her through so much already. It would have been cruel if he had not been worried for him, and Allura was not cruel. Just insensitive at times...

 

Coran easily replied, "Anyone other than Keith and Lance can come and support me. But, you all will have work that out yourselves." Coran softly glared at them all before turning back to the projection. Coran rarely glared at them and Lance was starting to figure that whatever Pidge and Hunk refused to tell him was actually very important. Even Keith was confused by the action, so it definitely was not just Lance.

 

Allura stood up awkwardly and said, "Well, I will go set the coordinates and start the ship." Then quickly ran away into the hall. Pidge watched her disappear then walked up to Coran.

 

"What else is there on this parasite?"

 

"Not much. And I am not sure how much of it is still accurate, but I can transfer the data to you." Coran said with a gentle smile.

 

Pidge lit up, "Let me go get my computer!" She runs over to the door but stops right before leaving turning back to her brothers. Hunk sighed and got up and leaves with Pidge leaving the rest of them in silence. 

 

Keith confidently broke the following silence by asking Shiro, "Why does Pidge hate Allura so much?"

 

"Yea," Lance exclaimed, "Why was Hunk ignoring her? Even you are being extra cruel to her. I mean, yeah, she has been a dick lately but I don't see why you guys have to be so mean." Keith nodded along staring Shiro down as the latter looked away with a pained expression.

 

For a few minutes, Shiro did not say anything and Lance was getting worried they pushed too hard. Keith glanced back at Lance silently asking if it was safe to continue and as Lance shrugged Coran spoke up. "It is because she said somethings she should have never said when you two were still unconscious."

 

That just made Lance and Keith more confused as they turned to Shiro silently demanding more information. Shiro just sighed and said, "That she did... She said to not overreact to you two being unconscious and while, now that I am calm, I know in a way she was right. But to tell us in that moment to not be worried," Shiro tightened his hands into a fist while his face tightened into a pained expression. "To call our fear a _temper tantrum_ like she could ever understand."

 

"She understands her mistake now," Coran said softly. But that was all that was needed to set Shiro off.

 

"But that does not change anything!" Lance jumped back at the sudden yell, unconsciously pulling Keith back with him as his eyes moved between Shiro and Coran. "T-to treat our feelings- our fears! Like they mean nothing! Like they were troublesome!!" Shiro's voice cracked making Lance and Keith flinch. 

 

"No, it doesn't. But she was still weak from what happened and all of the yelling was hurting her-" Shiro cut Coran off by standing up and yelling louder than before. Lance pulled Keith in close both of them trembling, a pain burning Lance's chest as Shiro and Coran's yelling made his ears buzz and head ache terribly. Keith gripped Lance's shirt tightly opening his mouth like he wanted to say something but nothing came out.

 

"STOP DEFENDING HER!! SHE WAS IN THE WRONG AND YOU NEED TO MAKE HER PROPERLY APOLOGIZE INSTEAD OF INSISTING WE FORGIVE HER!!"

 

"I WILL NOT ABANDON HER!! SHE ALREADY KNOWS SHE WAS WRONG AND WANTS TO APOLOGIZE!! YOU ARE THE ONES WHO REFUSE TO GIVE HER A CHANCE!!!"

 

Lance pulled Keith even closer to hi chest as the cold seeped into his bones, shutting his eyes tightly to block out the pain in his chest and the yelling from Shiro and Coran. Lance wanted to make them stop but his limbs locked up and he couldn't force his eyes to open. Lance knew he mesed up somehow when the yelling turned into a loud buzzing and the tightness of his chest made it impossible to breathe. The last thing Lance felt was Keith crying against his chest and a lone tear slide down his cheek.

 

* * *

 

Shiro knew something was wrong. He could feel it and he wanted nothing more than to get the painful feeling in his chest away. But for some reason he couldn't.

 

Every word was dragged out from him and hurled at Coran before he could attempt to filter which only made Shiro more frustrated. "SHE NEVER TRIED TO APOLOGIZE," Shiro growled trying to think of a way to focus attention on his siblings or at least get that thought across to Coran. "SHE ALWAYS PUTS THE MISSION BEFORE US! BEFORE MY SIBLINGS HEALTH! SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HER RELATIONSHIP WITH US!"

 

Shiro could not care less about what he was saying but he had no control over it. Every glare coupled with the motions and the words were not his, and Coran couldn't seem to see that. Shiro wasn't sure what was controlling but he knew he had to break free before-

 

A thought came to Shiro and he stopped trying to make himself stop yeling and focused on something inside himself. He focused on how his vision grew dimmer with each word, how his head beat against his skull becoming more unbearable by the second. And most importantly how his chest tightened, the  _emptiness_  he felt in his chest squeezing every involuntary word out of his mouth.

 

Shiro went through all of the possibilities of how he lost control over his own body, then he understood... It was the parasites all along. Creating the empty feeling inside of everyone. Controlling Keith and now controlling Shiro. Shiro's stomach dropped as he focused on Coran, trying once more to say anything other than the bull the parasite was making him spew. Anything to give Coran a hint on what was happening.

 

Unfortunately, Shiro had spent too much time trying to figure out what was going on. His vision was already black and Coran's voice was lost in the void. Shiro's heart sunk as he prayed that Pidge and Hunk would return quickly and force the parasite to stop before it gets any worse.

 

* * *

 

 

Coran coul not understand why Shiro was yelling at him. Shiro has always proven to be the more in control of his emotions  compared to the other paladins. Yet with each passing tick his arguments becomes more emotional base rather than logic. 

 

"OF COURSE SHE CARES," Coran wasn't sure how to get through Shiro when he was acting like this. "Sh-she just-"

 

"NO," Shiro's face was red his voice raw. "STOP DEFENDING HER! SHE DOES NOT CARE! YOU DO NOT CARE!"

 

"I DO CARE!" Coran was at a lost for words. How could Shiro think for even a second that Coran did not care for them. After all he did for them, for Shiro.

 

"PROVE IT!!"

 

Just as Coran was about to yell right back at Shiro, Pidge and Hunk busted into the room. The two took less than a tick to look around before jumping into action.

 

Hunk wrapped his large arms around Shiro squeezing the later tightly while lifting him up off the ground. Shiro seemed surprised and even more upset as he struggled against the yellow paladins tight hold. Coran was sure Shiro would have escaped and started fighting Hunk until he literally fainted in the yellow paladin's arms.

 

Coran could only watch, barely processing everything as Hunk carried Shiro's limp body over with the other paladins. Pidge was rubbing pith Lance and Keith's backs whispering something to them as tears flowed freely down their cheeks, their eyes screwed shut as tightly as possible. Neither Lance or Keith reacted when Hunk sat Shiro next to them and joined the hug himself. 

 

Only then did it dawn on Coran the situation he allowed them to get into. The  _emptiness_  was still an issue, and seeing how Pidge and Hunk were back so quickly from retrieving Pidge's laptop from across the castle. Neither of them had the laptop meaning they probably did not even make it to the green paladin's personal lab before they started running back. To allow the _emptiness_  to have its way with Keith and Lance, and probably Shiro as well, was irresponsible no matter the situation.

 

Coran bit his bottom lip in frustration as he realized the very fact that Shiro was not worried about Keith or Lance should have been a large indicator that something was wrong. Instead he got caught up in his emotions and defending Allura. _Just like Shiro said._  

 

Coran could not bring himself to look up at the paladins who were fighting so hard against something that is controlling them when he couldn't even control his own emotions. He could not stand comparing himself to children that are stronger than many of the adults he knew before the war. 

 

With his head hung low and chest tight with emotion he quickly walked out of the med bay and went to join Allura on the bridge. When he arrived Allura only gave him a soft look, "Prepare the teludav. And don't worry Coran. We will fix our mistakes and we will all become an even stronger team. We _will_ make things right again. "

 

For the first time, it was Allura who was supporting Coran, but that only made him feel worse. Coran quietly got to work refusing to look at the strong princess before him, that just the other day he still saw as an innocent child fighting a war at too young of an age. Not the adult before him now.

_I need to do better... I will do better._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that happened...
> 
> AND COrAn MaDe A MisTaKe!!!!!!!!!! WHo's mad at me?? Well too bad because Coran is far from perfect but our Paladin's aren't mad at him, he's just mad at himself. 
> 
> AND for all of you who have been DYING for me to finally give some information on what the hell is going on there you go! (Yes Shiro is very much on the right track with his thinking) And I promise next chapter is going to be much more concrete details on these hellspawn parasites.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahahahahhhahahahaahhhahahahahahahhahahahhahahha, sorry. You'll get it when you read the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY GUYS!! Been gone for nearly a whole month! (School is no fun when you are 90% sure your mama is gonna kill ya because of that zero teach won't let ya make up HAHAHAHAHAHAHA)
> 
> But HEy I'm back now! And with a LOVELY update, <3 Hope you all enjoy it! 
> 
> I promise You'll get the summary for this chapter once you read it!

The planet of Emosíe is a beautiful planet with a purple hue from space and was even more stunning on the surface. With trees of purple leaves and a light green sky at noon, Coran felt at peace on the foreign planet. The Emosíenens were also lovely creatures, most of them covered in varying layers and colors of fur depending on where on the planet they originate from. 

Coran had made arrangements to meet with the different Emosíenen leaders and leading scientists in hope to get adequate information on the emosékontrolí. The leaders were only slightly disappointed when it was only Coran and none of the other paladins that arrived. 

"They are an intriguing species," one of the leaders, a female with thick black fur that looked extremely soft and comfortable, explained while they waited for the scientists of the planet to come with the necessary information and, hopefully, antidote. "They express one emotion visually while feeling a storm feelings that they force down from the eyes of others."

"It is both strange and amazing at the same time." A male Emosíenen with short light brown fur threw his arm around Coran's shoulders laughing lightly. Coran chuckled along awkwardly, unsure of how to change the topic from the paladins. 

He never did talk to any of them after he ignorantly made things worse for the children. They deserved so much better from him yet here was, running away from them. Coran frowned lowing his head pathetically, how could he be thinking about other things in front of these kind aliens who took time out of their busy schedule for this sudden meeting. 

"Sir Coran," the light brown Emosíenen startled Coran out of his thoughts with his soft voice. "Do you wish to talk about your feelings? Us Emosíenens are very good when it comes to working emotions out."

"I do not doubt it, sir Molion. Unfortunately, I fear I do not have time to be worried about myself as the paladins are the ones who are truly suffering," Coran said as he bowed his head respectfully.

Molion shook his head as another Emosíenen leader stepped up beside him, their fur just as short as his but a darker brown than Molion's. "I beg your pardon sir Coran, but everyone is entitled to their own suffering in dark times. Including you. You are suffering just as much as the paladins, and do not try to say otherwise." They left no room for argument, but that did not stop Coran from shaking his head.

"Jar is right you know," the door opened revealing a team of scientist cutting Molion off. Coran took advantage of this and quickly moved from under Molion's arm towards the large table in the middle of the room. Molion could only sigh and sit down at his designated spot in between Jar and the female Emosíenen that Coran never did get the name of, but it was not the time to think about that as the scientists set up all of their information.

As the scientists finished setting up, all of the leaders were seated at the sides of the table while Coran sat at the head of the table, directly opposite of the scientists. The lead scientists, an Emosíenen with light green fur and strange looking glasses, stepped in front of the others and spoke. 

"As you suspected, sir Coran. The symptoms you have described are most definitely the cause of the emosékontrolí. As years have passed, the emosékontrolí have been focusing more of their attacks on aliens rather than our species as we have developed an immunity to it. Of course, we can still be infected by them, but the emosékontrolí have an easier time feeding off of foreigners, as they do not suspect anything and are more likely to try and contain their emotions than we are."

Coran patiently listened but this was not the information he wanted. He  _needed_ to know how to get the parasites out of the paladins. He  _needed_ a cure, and the scientist must have realized this from reading his emotions. 

"I apologize," the scientists bowed and motioned for another to hand Coran a paper. "That is the directions for the antidote we have created. It, along with them being more open with their emotions and each other, should chase the emosékontrolí out of their system. Unfortunately, I will need them to come down here to properly diagnose all of them."

Coran bit his bottom lip with a frown, "Is there any way you could diagnose them upon the ship?"

The scientists frowned, turning away to think. Jar asked, "Why can they not come down?"

Coran sighed, "Two of the paladins are nearly completely under the control of the emosékontrolí. It is so bad that too much negative emotion will force them to completely shut down." The Emosíenens in the room all made varying worried sounds, Coran continued. "Another is also at the stage where the emosékontrolí can now physically control him." The scientists murmuring only grew louder as Coran's heart pounded uncomfortably in his chest.

The fluffy female Emosíenen got up and rubbed her hand in large circles on Coran's back, "Breathe sir Coran. It will be all right. The Paladins are still in control of themselves most of the time, right?" Coran forced himself to nodded, focusing more on her warm hand and gentle tone than the noise from the other Emosíenens in the room. "Then they will be fine," she says confidently.

Molion's hand join hers, "Fair is right, even if you do not believe it sir Coran. There have been other aliens who were worse off than the paladins. Of course, they spent a lot more time on Emosíe than the paladins, so it is concerning they are so far along with the corruption," Fair jabbed Molion's side with her elbow making him yelp in pain. "B-but, they will be fine."

"If we have all of the necessary equipment sent up with you, would it be possible," Jar asked the scientists. 

They all looked at each other and nodded, "Yes we should be able to. It will take longer setting everything up, but it will most definitely work."

For the first time all day, Coran was genuinely excited and hopeful. He didn't feel so pathetic anymore and he could have sworn that the Emosíenens were happier than he was.

* * *

Keith was not sure what do with all of the buzzing in the castle. 

Coran's trip down to Emosíe was very successful and of course, Keith was excited to not have to be worried about any of his brothers or sisters fainting or losing control of themselves because of the emptiness, or whatever parasite Coran had said was responsible for everything. But watching Emosíenens of all sizes run through the halls, talking about things in their native tongues was dizzying which did not help his already exhausted state. 

One of the Emosíenens said that they should all avoid trying to hide any emotions, positive or negative, and avoid being alone where their thoughts could fester. Keith knew it would be far from easy but promised alongside his siblings, and Allura, anyway. 

Coran's refusal to talk to any of the paladins did not help things either. The ginger altean would run away whenever Shiro would enter the same room as him and would suddenly go mute when Keith or Lance tried talking to him. Lance had told Keith that Coran was avoiding them because he felt bad for what happened but Keith could not understand why that meant the best idea was avoiding them.

The tension between Allura, Pidge, and Hunk made it even worse, unsurprisingly. Since they were not allowed to let any emotions fester, Pidge decided now was the best time to kill Allura with her words. Whenever Allura would enter a room Pidge was in, Pidge would immediately bombarding her with insults, curses, threats, and even actual objects. It did not help that Allura had to retort leading to, on more than one occasion, Shiro physically separating them with an exhausted sigh. 

Hunk was far less, extra as Lance would say, but no less cruel than Pidge. He often preferred to just whisper his feelings so no one would have to respond but Hunk was awful at whispering someone responded nearly every time. 

All of the tension ended up with the Emosíenens separating Keith and his siblings form Allura and Coran entirely.

"Pidge, was it really necessary for you to throw the equipment at Allura?" Shiro was looking down on Pidge with his signature disappointed dad stance but his expression screamed,  _Let me sleep!!_

"It was the emosékontrolí," Pidge said lamely, refusing to look Shiro, or anyone for that matter, in the eye. Shiro was not amused with her answer and even Keith could tell she was not serious. Lance seemed actually upset from her answer and said so. 

"That is not something to joke about, Pidge." Keith couldn't remember ever hearing Lance sound so cold, and it could just be the emosékontrolí, but Keith doubted it. Pidge only curled in on herself, whispering an apology. 

Hunk immediately wrapped an arm around her small shoulders, "It is alright, let's just avoid making this any harder than it already is." Hunk said softly.

"The Emosíenens already helped with that," Keith could not stop himself. Luckily no one was upset by what he said. Not so luckily, his mouth decided to keep talking to fill the silence, "When will they be done setting everything up?"  

Of course, no one knew the answer to that stupid question, but they did not have to respond as the door opened revealing an Emosíenen with light green fur and strange looking glasses. "Which one of you do you think is the worse out of all of you?"

Keith looked to Lance along with everyone else, even Lance acknowledge that it was him when he raised his hand, albeit, very reluctantly. 

The Emosíenen nodded, "Then let's get going. Choose one of the other paladins to come along with you." 

Keith wanted to go, he really did. But he figured that may not be a good idea. Keith sucked at comforting others and remaining cool in stressful situations and with the emosékontrolí messing everything up, he was about as helpful as a cactus at this point. So, Keith was really surprised when Lance turned to Keith first. Sure Keith has been clinging to Lance for the past few days, but he was way out of his league this time.

Keith shook his head, and Lance turned to Hunk, but not before his whole posture dropped with disappointment. Hunk left with Lance, he too throwing Keith a questioning look that Keith could only turn away from.

_Pathetic._

* * *

Shiro only waited for a moment after Lance and Hunk left to talk about the elephant in the room.

"Why did you say no to Lance?" Pidge figured it was because of what the Emosíenens said that Shiro was being so blunt. that was something she would say, not Shiro. He would try to awkwardly ease into the conversation making someone else, usually Pidge, frustrated and say it bluntly for him. 

Keith looked down at the floor regretfully, "I couldn't go with him.."

"Why not?" Pidge surprised her self with how gentle and soft her voice was. Luckily neither of her brothers reacted to it.

"Because," Keith's voice came out high and he sounded hurt, emotionally, "I can't. I am not fit to be by someone's side in stressful situations. What if he needed a comforting hand? Or a-a calm presence to keep him calm?" She shoved his head into his hands and curled in on himself. "I'm already a mess! 'Nd I'm not even doin' anything!" 

Before Pidge knew it, she was right by his side, a hand on his back rubbing in small circles. Shiro was on the other side of Keith, his hand squeezing the shoulder closest to Pidge whispering softly to him, "Hey, hey. It is alright." Keith let out a choked sob but refused to say anything or look up.

Shiro tried again, turning Keith's head gently so Keith would face him "Look at me, Keith." When Keith did Shiro continued, "It is alright to not be able to keep calm. Expected even. This whole situation is a mess, so we are too."

"Besides," Pidge chimed in Keith and Shiro looked over to her,"both Shiro and Hunk are a far cry from cool and collected. And we know better than anyone else that your method is nothing like what most would consider normal." Keith huffed but a small smile graced his lips all the same, victory to Pidge.

Shiro actually chuckled, "She is right. And Lance never would have asked you if he did not think that you being there would not be comforting."

 

Somehow that was not enough for Keith as he looked down sorrow seeping through his pice of their bond, "But, this whole time I have been clinging to Lance ever since my episode. How could-"

Pidge cut Keith off, finding his whole argument ridiculous. "Keith. The whole time you have been clinging to Lance, Lance has been clinging to you. You both looked for comfort from the other and comforted each other. Just like how comforting you is comforting me right now. We are family Keith. It doesn't matter if you can say something sweet and heartwarming or confident boosting. It doesn't matter if you can make things that help win this war or cookies that help this battle in our heads. We love you for you. You are much more capable than you think and we would never want you any other way."

Keith's eyes were wide and shiny with unshed tears. Shiro moved his hand around Pidge as well pulling her and Keith close into an extremely tight, yet far from uncomfortable, hug. "I could not have said it better."

The bond, shared between her and her siblings, was filled to the brim with love. To the point Pidge would not be surprised if somehow Hunk and Lance had heard what she had said.

Shiro, Keith, and Pidge sat in comfortable silence swimming in lo- pain? 

_It hurts_

Pidge pulled from the hug expecting-hoping- it was Shiro or Keith who said that. When they looked back at her with similarly fearful expressions she knew something went wrong.

_No more_

She was on her feet in seconds, fear seeping into her bones with every second.

_Stop Please!!_

They ran out of the door as fast as their feet would take them.

_Pidge!_

Tears were spilling out of her eyes as she cried, "Lance!"

 

_Hunk!_

Pidge stumbled on her feet, but she didn't stop. She couldn't stop. She won't stop.

_Shiro!_

"We are coming, Lance!" Shiro was so far ahead, maybe he will reach Lance before it was too late.

_Keith!_

A loud thud sounded behind her. Pidge screamed when she saw Keith on the floor, deathly pale and shaking.

_Save me!_

She had no idea what to do, her hands hovered over Keith's body, Lance's voice too loud, "SHIRO!"

_No More!_

He did not come back. He was too far away. Lance was too loud.

_Stop!_

Keith would not stop shaking and neither did Pidge's hands. She couldn't do this. She begged for someone to help her. Anyone-

_Please!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahahahahhhahahahaahhhahahahahahahhahahahhahahha, aren't I just LOVELY!!
> 
> I could've totally ended this on a nice note, but where is the fun in that???? 
> 
> Anyways, comment on how you enjoyed that LOVELY ending <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo~ This chapter is going to be an emotional roller-coaster ride, that's for sure!
> 
> Sorry for taking so long to update as always but I am really proud of this chapter so I am not super sorry!
> 
> I would say more but like I really want you all to read this and love it so get going!

Allura should have known. She absolutely should have seen this coming.

 

Allura herself did not fully understand human limits, so there was no way in all of the universes that the Emosíenens who knew even less about them, physically and mentally, were capable of pulling this off without any problems. So she should have expected something to fo wrong. As the human saying goes, "anything that can go wrong, will go wrong." (Courtesy of Hunk)

Yet she was still surprised when the screaming reached her ears where she and Coran waited patiently. She jumped up to her feet and was out of the door in a matter of ticks, not looking back to make sure Coran was still following her. She practically flew down the hallway, almost missing another cry from help as she passed the hallway.

She stopped and turned debating about which cry to help firsts, luckily that was when Coran caught up. "I will take care of the problem in the medical bay, you take care of the other one and meet me in the medical bay with whichever paladins you find," he said, struggling to catch his breath before he took off again in the direction they were heading before.

Without much more thought, Allura backtracked and found Pidge on her knees hovering over Keith who laid on the floor. Allura slid over on her knees next to Pidge, hesitating to place her hand on the smaller girls shoulder. Pidge was shaking, her expression extremely pale, and Keith was worse. 

Keith's whole body convulsed in extreme pain, visually getting worse as the seconds past. His skin devoid of nearly all color and covered in sweat.  

"Pidge, what happened?" Allura tried to ask as softly as possible knowing she has not had the best experiences with Pidge these past few days. 

"I-I don't know," the fear in the Green Paladin's eyes stabbed Allura's heart. She has never seen Pidge so vulnerable, so terrified, so young. And all of a sudden she realized just how young these paladins were in comparison to the paladins of old...

"We-we were having a bonding moment and-and then all of a sudden Lance, his pain and scream just completely filled the bond, it hurt a lot and it was terrifying so we ran to go help him and Hunk but-but then Keith just collapsed like this and Shiro, he was too far away to notice and to come back and help, I screamed for help, but Lance also screamed at the same time completely drowning me out I think and Keith wouldn't respond so I-"

"Pidge." Allura cut off Pidge's rambling with a firm yet gentle voice while also gripping her shoulder a bit tighter. "Breathe Pidge. We can do this. We will get Keith the help he needs but I need you to breathe and help me." 

Pidge nodded numbly, "Good, now let's take this jacket off of him and get him more comfortable." 

They carefully removed the jacket, making sure not to move him too much or hurt him further, though both girls found it extremely difficult as Keith's body continued to convulse at random intervals. By the time they managed to get it off of him Keith's body stopped convulsing terribly, coming at larger intervals now and only in his arms and legs.

"Do you want to put him in your lap or mine," Allura asked cautiously, still walking on eggshells around Pidge. Just because they worked together to help Keith did not mean Pidge trusted Allura yet. 

"Mine," Pidge says so softly Allura questions for a tick if she even heard it, but moves Keith's head into Pidge's lap anyway. With Keith no longer in danger and Pidge significantly calmer Allura gets up to join Coran and give Pidge space she probably wanted more than anything. 

Before Allura could take even two steps, something pulls on the bottom of her dress. Allura expected it to possibly be one of the mice trying to keep her from leaving, Allura had not seen or heard one of them since she ran out of the room earlier. But it was not any of the mice. It was Pidge.

She was not looking at Allura, her hair covering the green paladin's eyes, but the tight grip on her dress made it clear the small paladin had not done it by mistake. 

_Is it possible... could she truly wish for me to stay..._

Allura sat down next to Pidge, flattening out her dress beneath her after Pidge let it go. They sat in a semi-awkward yet peaceful silence, Pidge trembling and jumping t random moments. Allura was not sure what to make of Pidge's sudden change,  _maybe it was a human way of saying thanks? Or maybe-_

__

"Thank you," Pidge's soft voice interrupted Allura's thoughts. The green paladin has yet to look up at Allura but continued on softly, "and, I am sorry."

_Huh..._ Allura turned away from staring at Pidge and said softly with a smile on her face as well. "I am sorry as well... And thank you."

* * *

 

 

Shiro burst into the med bay and was immediately held back by two Emosíenens. "Let me go," he growled right when Lance let out another blood-curdling scream through the bond while Hunk screamed his voice raw with anger.

"LET HIM GO YOU BASTARDS!!" 

Hunk's face was red while he fought against two large Emosíenens who seemed to be barely holding him back. The scientist working on Lance, on the other hand, continued working like Hunk did not say anything. 

Now that Shiro got a good look around, he could see Lance was frozen; his blue eyes wide, jaw slack, hands in a weak fist, his chest still. Shiro would have believed Lance was dead if he was not still screaming through their bond. 

"LET HIM YOU GO!! I SWEAR-!!," Hunk was pulling against the Emosíenens even harder dragging them both along with him.

"Sir please," one of the Emosíenens holding Hunk back pleaded, "You must let the scientist work. It best this way."

Unfortunately, Hunk was not listening to him, still trying to break free and get to Lance. Honestly, Shiro wanted to help Hunk, but it was clear that it would probably be best if they quit fighting. Shiro took a shaky breath and sent more calm and feelings through the bond to combat all the hectic feelings.

Shiro was actually surprised when everyone almost immediately calmed down. Lance was still scared but latched onto Shiro emotionally as quickly as possible. Pidge was just a second after Lance, gripping just as tightly in fear. Keith was kind of slow grabbing it, almost like he was not fully conscious. (Now that Shiro thought about, Pidge and Keith had stopped following him at some point.) Hunk on the other hand practically ignored the others in favor of getting to Lance physically.

"Hunk," Shiro said cautiously. Since he was no longer fighting the Emosíenens they released their grip on him, allowing Shiro to walk towards Hunk. 

Hunk glared at Shiro like a with pure furry but Shiro continued on calmly. "Hunk. You need to calm down, they are helping Lance."

"LIES!" Hunk lunged at Shiro but was held back by the Emosíenens. "IF THEY WERE REALLY HELPING HIM HE WOULD NOT BE SCREAMING THROUGH THE BOND RIGHT NOW HE WOULDN'T LOOK DEAD!" Hunk's voice cracked on the last word and Shiro could not blame him. 

Lance was perfectly still, his blues eyes empty and glazed over while his jaw was slack, his head split open as the Emosíenen scientist worked. It was a sickening sight, one he was glad Keith and Pidge could not see, as it sent shivers down his spine. 

But through the bond, Lance's screams had been reduced to whimpers with Keith and Pidge attempting to comfort him. Pidge herself was still afraid of something that was a lot calmer than when she initially latched, while Keith still seemed spacy, not fully sure what is going on other than comforting Lance.

Shiro sighs and returns his focus to Hunk who was still glaring at him. Shiro opens his mouth to say something but is cut off when Coran bursts in, red in the face and panting.

"I-hah- I am so sorry boys!" Coran was bent over, his hands on his knees to steady himself, still struggling to catch his breath. Shiro glanced over at Hunk who was staring at Coran with a frown, still to tense for the Emosíenens to comfortably let him go. "Okay," Shiro looked back at Coran who was finally calming down. "I am good. Now listen to me boys, it is very dangerous for the Emosíenens to give Lance painkillers any stronger than what he has as his heart my slow to the point of death."

Shiro nodded, much calmer now that there was a reason behind why Lance was screaming, especially when he considered that Lance just being terrified having no idea what would happen. Unfortunately, that was far from enough for Hunk. 

"I DO NOT CARE! LANCE IS IN PAIN I NEED TO-"

"HUNK!" Shiro cut Hunk off, gripping his brother's shoulders tightly while forcing him to look Shiro in the eyes. "We can not do anything here. You screaming and refusing to acknowledge the bond between all of us is only making things worse for Lance." Shiro paused letting everything sink in for his younger brother. 

He then continued with a much softer tone, "We all need you to calm down and breathe. Trust me, we all want to fix this whole situation. But we can only do that when you work together with the rest of us."

Fear and guilt flashed across Hunks face before he went limp in the Emosíenens arms. They looked to Shiro silently asking if it was safe to let go and Shiro nodded. 

Hunk, still shocked, collapsed into Shiro's waiting arms. Shiro let out a relieved sigh as Hunk finally grasped onto the bond and can feel Lance and Pidge relax even more with Hunk within their reach again.

Coran moved around the two to help assist the Emosíenen scientist as they worked to remove the parasite from Lance's rain. Just thinking about it made Shiro's stomach turn. They would all have to have the parasites taken out, but Shiro did not think he could stand to watch any of them. No, he knew he would not be able to watch them, but he had to make sure the others would be well during and after each procedure.

The tightening of Hunks grip on Shiro's shirt draws him out of his thoughts and back to their bond, overflowing with comfort and love. Lance is still in a bit of pain but much calmer, Pidge has calm down completely, Hunk continuously apologized-both internally and externally, while Keith was starting to get a tighter grip on the bond, not as spacey as before but still weak.

Shiro decided he would worry about all of that stuff later and for now, he would focus on his brothers and making sure everything was alright now.

 

* * *

 

 

Keith was somewhat aware of everything that was going on even after he fainted, after all, he could still feel his siblings through the bond. 

Pidge was terrified at first, and that scared Keith even more than just Lanc being scared, but was slowly calming down thanks to Shiro and some outside force Keith could not reach. Lance was still in pain and afraid, but was now calming down thanks to Shiro and a now calmer Pidge. Hunk was a bit harder to find at first but when he did join in the bond, he was mainly feeling remorseful but calm enough to still help Pidge and Lance. Shiro had random tiny spikes of fear, that Keith wondered if the others felt it as well, but Keith knew they were probably from overthinking as Shiro focused back on Lance, Pidge, and Hunk.

Despite being to feel the bond and interact with his siblings to a degree, Keith could feel something keeping him from fully latching on to the bond. It was especially annoying when the bond would completely disappear for a second before returning. It made Keith even more anxious and extremely happy when he did finally wake up. 

His head hurt like a bitch but seeing Pidge's face directly above his made the pain of opening his eyes worth it. The weak and shaky smile on Pidge's face and the love that she emitted both in her smile and her piece of the bond. The love surrounding Keith mentally increased tenfold as the others seemed to realize he was awake from fainting. The feeling reminded Keith of something similar to a group hug, and could not help but want it to be a physical one instead.

Pidge started saying something, her voice a bit higher than normal, but Keith could not focus on her exact words, his head still aching a bit too much to allow such mental work. 

Thankfully Allura was there to calm her down. Keith figured that Allura was probably the person who calmed Pidge down when he had first fainted and resolved to thank her later. For now, though he took deep breaths so he could focus on actually hearing the words the two girls were saying. 

"-Eith? Keith? Can you hear me?" Pidge's voice was so soft and Keith was so grateful for it as he nodded his head gingerly. "How are you feeling? Does anything hurt?"

Keith tried to sit up and could just barely lift his head. Thankfully Allura and Pidge realized what he was trying to do and helped him sitting him against the wall. Keith sighed, "My head hurts but other than that I am fine."

"That good," Pidge sighed in relief, even Allura looked a little relieved to hear his answer. Keith felt a bit guilty to see them both so stressed out about him.

Keith was also a bit upset how much strength it seemed to take to lift his hand and rub Pidge's cheek but managed anyways. His heart ached as she leaned into the touch with a tear. They sat silently for a few minutes, Allura rubbing small circles on Pidges back as she cried and small circles on Keith's arm for some reason he could not comprehend before soft footsteps filled the long hallway.

Allura stood up to greet Coran who was walking briskly towards them, his expression a bit to read with the mix of emotions. 

Keith was startled when Pidge stood up as well and walked over to Coran and Allura, effectively keeping the two Alteans from coming closer to Keith. Whether she did it to help him or not Keith did not know. He groaned as he tried to pull himself up to hear what the three of them were talking about, though Keith did not get very far as they finished their conversations. 

Allura walked over and helped Keith to his feet, holding most of his weight with an arm around his waist. "Do not worry Keith. We are going to go see the others." She said walking him forward. "From what Coran said, we should arrive shortly after they finish the procedure on Lance, so you will not be too stressed when we get there."

Coran had already disappeared, not once looking or saying anything to Keith when Pidge joined his side, "You will be going next but after a bit more rest. Coran went ahead to explain to the others what happened and set things up with the Emosíenens." Her eyes were filled with worry as they slowly walked towards the med bay. 

Keith hated the slow pace but knew better than to push himself even more than he already did, not that Pidge or Allura would let him. So instead he focused on the bond between his brothers and sister, keeping himself busy for the long walk to the med bay and to not focus on the slight awkward atmosphere between Allura and Pidge. 

He knew him fainting had probably pushed their relationship back in the right direction but there was a lot more talking that needed to be done between them, and Hunk too. Keith wondered if Coran was more willing to talk to Shiro, Lance, and himself now but that was not too likely considered when Coran seemed not too eager to even look in Keith's direction earlier.

 

Keith sighed but was pleased to see that they were already near the med bay, meaning it would not be long before he got that hug he so desperately wanted. 

 

When they walked in an Emosíenen pointed them in the direction of one of the rooms connected to the med bay. Allura spoke with them for a second before leading Pidge and Keith to the room. As they walked in Coran was leaving, not even sparing a glance at Keith once again, but Keith did not get to focus on that for long as Lance had immediately launched himself at Keith. If it was not for Allura and Pidge he was sure he would have fallen. 

 

Hunk came and scoped Pidge, Lance, and Keith into a hug while Shiro attacked the other side, effectively trapping an awkward Allura in the hug. Keith barely kept himself from purring in contentment from finally getting his wish as Hunk and Shiro started rambling off apologies. 

 

"I am so sorry I left you two. I didn't even realize that I had left you two behind. I-I should have been paying more attention, I am so sorry." Shiro sounded just seconds away from crying making Keith's heart squeeze in sorrow and the need to comfort. 

 

"Don't be sorry Shiro," Pidge said, her own voice shaking with emotion. "Lance and Hunk needed you and if you had not calmed them down, I doubt I would have been able to calm down as fast as I did myself. Besides, Allura was there to help."

 

Hunk and Shiro both squeezed tighter in that moment, but Keith doubted it was for the same reasons. "Still," Shiro's voice was weak and he probably did not have anything following it up but Keith felt the need to shut down any possible arguments. 

 

"There is no still Shiro," Keith said, holding Lance close to his chest in hopes it would help Lance relax even a tiny bit. It worked. "There was no way you could have been in two places at once. Hunk and Lance needed you and you helped them. Besides, I doubt there was anything you could do that Allura and Pidge did not accomplish." Keith desperately hoped that he did not come off as rude, but the soft chuckle from his siblings and Allura soothed his worries almost immediately. 

 

Hunk released his tight hug along with Shiro who had a soft smile. Both of them lead the group away from the door to sit against the wall. Hunk filled the silence as they all sat down, "He is right Shiro." Pidge sat in the very center, Keith and Shiro on one side, Lance and Hunk on the other side, Allura sitting next to Shiro but still close by. "If you hadn't reached out to Lance, he probably would have never calmed down and there was no way the Emosíenens or Coran for that matter would have been able to calm me down and realize my mistake." Pidge had started to show signs of agreeing with Hunk but before she could open her mouth she was cut off.

 

"None of you made any mistakes," Allura said confidently despite the fact that her voice was so soft. "Did you all forget that you are all being controlled by the emosékontrolí?" Keith would have laughed at the faces his siblings made if Lance had not laughed first. Keith was laughing, but he was laughing at the glares they threw at Lance for him laughing at them. 

 

Allura continued, her voice no longer soft as if she was afraid. "I mean it. None of you have done anything wrong. The emosékontrolí made Shiro loose focus on Keith and Pidge. The emosékontrolí made Hunk lose his temper and judgment. The emosékontrolí made Pidge loose control of her emotions and have a near panic attack. The emosékontrolí made Lance's pain and fear stronger than it probably actually was. Quiznack, I am almost positive it was the emosékontrolí that made Keith pass out in the first place! None of you made any mistakes. In fact, the very fact that you all managed to calm down and regain control of yourselves is outstanding."

 

By the end of Allura's speech, everyone was staring at her with their mouths hanging open and their hearts filled nothing but love and thanks. Not that she could tell that.

 

"S-so," Allura faltered under the paladins piercing stares, looking away. "I know I have not tried to understand you all or what you all were going through. But now I know. And I hope you can forgive me for the things I have said and done these past few quintants." Allura bowed her head refusing to look up at the paladins while they looked between themselves. Each of them sharing a small sadistic smirk. 

 

"Well," Pidge started. Keith almost felt bad when Allura subtly flinched. "I think we may be able to forgive you. I mean, yeah, you were a douche these last few quintants..." 

 

"But," Lance continued, Allura lowered her head, even more, making it hard for Keith to resist comforting her, which must have made it hell for his brothers who were more inclined to comforting someone. "You have more than made up for it. Siblings are not perfect, we all make mistakes."

 

The shock on Allura's face was almost comical as she stared at the gentle smiles that adorned Keith and his sibling's faces. "Wh-what are you saying?" Once again Allura's voice was small, scared, but this time it was also hopeful. 

 

"What we are getting at Allura," Shiro says while wrapping an arm around her back pulling her close. "Is that we forgive you, _Sister_."

 

Keith cannot say for certain if he has never seen Allura cry. Maybe he has seen her shed a couple of tears before wiping them away, or maybe he has heard her choked sobs from a distance. But seeing her cry while wrapping her in a large group hug, Lance wiping away the tears while Hunk and Shiro rubbed her back, Pidge laughing at her while Keith himself just held her close. That was the best feeling in the universe.

 

Well, second best, to feeling another member join in the family bond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was fun! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter don't forget to leave comments guys!
> 
> Side note, I am almost positive that I have maybe 2 more chapters for this fic. And 2 is kind of pushing it considering all of the stuff I need to wrap up! ANYWAYS, point is, This fic is coming to an end! I did not know that was possible, to be honest, but I am extremely happy. This would be my very first multi-chapter fic that I not only posted but managed to complete!
> 
> Once again, please comment! I really want to know how you guys felt about this chapter!


	11. chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The operations are continuing a lot more calmly this time around but Coran is still keeping his distance. Let's just say they all cannot wait for the emosékontrolí to be gone for good...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am extremely sorry for the impossibly long wait (though I doubt there's a lot of you reading this right now). A lot of stuff happened and I am the type of person who writes better on a computer than on my phone so when my computer crashed I could not work on this fic for weeks. Luckily I am using my mom's old computer so I got this chapter and chapter 12 complete. Chapter 13 is actually going to be a short epilogue so it may not even really count as a chapter but as you can see by the chapter count this fic is coming to an end. Gonna leave the sappy stuff for the epilogue, for now, enjoy this not super short but still short chapter.

Keith's operation went a thousand times smoother than Lance's had, which was a relief Hunk desperately needed. There were times when Keith's fear spiked making everyone react badly, but they were able to keep calm for the most part. Hunk made it crystal clear that he would only be calm with Lance in his lap. Lance's nerves, unfortunately, did not share the same sentiment as Hunk. Even Pidge holding his hand and Allura's stories did little to calm Lance's nerves. 

Shiro wanted to help, but he knew there was nothing he could other than keep them calm and mentally connected. As soon as Keith rejoined the group the tension should leave, but until then he would have to wait. 

 

It did not help that Coran seemed determined to torture Shiro by hovering outside the door, occasionally poking his head in as if to check and make sure they were still alright. It only frustrated Shiro more each and every time he did it. There was still so much for them to talk about but with Coran hovering Shiro could barely focus and keep the emosékontrolí from making his anger shoot through the roof. 

Shiro sighed as Coran disappeared from around the corner for the twelfth time since Keith left for his operation. Allura scooted up and put a comforting arm around Shiro's shoulders, "Are you feeling anxious about your operation?"

Shiro shook his head, operation nerves he could deal with. Coran hovering at distance like an annoying stalker, he could not. "It's Coran."

"Oh," she said simply looking at the door they both were sure the ginger Altean was hiding behind, "He feels awful for what happened you know."

"Of course I know," Shiro barely, suppresses another sigh. "But he won't stay long enough for us to properly talk."

"He is afraid and for good reason." Shiro groaned in frustration as Allure continued. "I am sure you have noticed that you tend to get angry for no reason when Coran appears. I know it is most likely the emosékontrolí, but that is a very good reason for Coran to stay away. If you cannot control it when he is at a distance what would happen if he actually tried to speak with you?"

Unfortunately, Shiro was fully aware of how little control he had on the emosékontrolí.  _Probably used all of what little control I had during Lance's operation_ , Shiro thought grimly. Shiro tried his best to hide this fact but apparently, he was failing even harder than he assumed.

 

Another sigh escapes his lips while Allura rubbed his back in small circles. "How about this," she says softly, as if to calm a small child, "after the rest of us has had the operation, I'll help you corner him so that the two of you can have a proper conversation?"

Shiro gave her tense smile but did not get a chance to respond as an Emosíenen walked in, carrying a limp and barely awake Keith in his arms. Lance jumped up and ran over to the Emosíenen quickly followed by Hunk and Pidge to take Keith into their arms and hold him close. The Emosíenen turned to Shiro and softly said, "I shall return shortly for you Black Paladin."

After a quick nod from Shiro and Allura, the Emosíenen left them to all get in a cuddle pile around Keith as long as they could, all of them, including Allura, drowning themselves in the safety and unity of their bond. 

The door opened up from behind them and Shiro uselessly tried to keep his anger from spiking as he felt Coran's longing stare on his back. As soon as the door closed the tingle in his back was rubbed away by Allura and Hunk, calming him almost instantly with regret following close behind. 

Shiro could not wait for the emosékontrolí to be gone for good...

 

* * *

 

 

Allura knew Shiro did not mean to scare Coran away with a glare every time he tried to come in. She also knew that the others were aware of what the black paladin was doing, even if they did not bring it up. But she had no idea if actually trapping Coran and forcing him to talk to Shiro, without the emosékontrolí, would be a good thing. 

Even now, fully capable of feeling the emotions and presence of the paladins, Allura still felt like she should not be a part of it. She did not deserve the warmth and love of the paladins after all she had done. Not to mention the small part of her that was actually mad at them for whatever reason, but she assumed it was probably just the emosékontrolí. Yet it seemed to change nothing.

 

True to his word, after a few minutes the same Emosíenen came and lead Shiro out, and as soon as the operation began the remaining paladins were feeling anxious again, though this time around Keith was the most anxious of them all. It seemed nothing could calm them and it broke Allura's heart to feel it.

It did not take long for Coran to peak his head in and out of habit Allura started rubbing whichever back her hand happened to be on. (It was Hunk who was in no way upset which made Allura feel extremely embarrassed.) Lance called out to Coran, not even trying to sound anything except tired and worried, "Come on in Coran."

Coran gave small smile and shook his head, "No thanks my boy. I am good right here." Allura frowned, she understood him not coming closer when Shiro was here but not coming now was just strange. 

"Why?" Pidge had tilted her head to the side frowning along her brothers. Coran did not respond just turning his head away to hide his face from them. After a moment of silence, Allura could feel the stares of the paladins upon the back of her head almost as strongly as the curiosity dominating the bond. 

Allura bit her lip and heaved herself up and walked over to Coran who refused to look at her even for a glance. 

"Coran," her voice came out even softer than she expected but she knew he had heard her clearly because the lack of a reaction. "They are not mad at you. And Shiro was not really mad at you it was-"

"Princes please," Coran cut her off, his voice soft and broken. "They may have forgiven me but I cannot forgive myself." With that, he left, not allowing Allura to finish. 

Part of Allura wanted to run after him. To tell him that yes, he was in the wrong in that moment, but he had long since repented. To comfort the man who had helped through all of her own struggles. The man who helped her reconnect with her paladins, her new family.

 

But another part could not leave that room. A part that could not leave her newfound family for any reason. A part that was sure he would come back and everything would be right again. A part that she wanted nothing more than for it to be right. 

With balled fist and tears threatening to spill from her eyes, Allura returned to the side of her new siblings and cried, taking comfort in the love and warmth they provided her that she was not sure she deserved.

Allura could not wait for the emosékontrolí to be gone for good...

 

* * *

 

 

Coran never came back after that. Not to stick his head in for a second or anything like that. Allura cried for the rest of Shiro's operation and part of Hunk's. Nothing the paladins did helped her, not that they could do much considering they themselves were just barely keeping their spirits up with Hunk away, Pidge and Lance being the worse of them all.

And just like that Hunk's operation ended and after a quick rest for all of their emotions Pidge was off for her operation. At this point, anxiety was the only thing keeping the team awake and still, Coran refused to make an appearance. 

A silent wish for Coran to simply pop his head in resonated through the small, dysfunctional family. After all, they were incomplete without the man who stood by their side and lifted them up when things got rough.

Before they knew it Pidge was back in there arms, being cuddled as tightly possible by Allura and Keith with Lance, Shiro, and Hunk holding the huddle together against a wall. Soon, too soon if you asked any of them, an Emosíenen came in and took Allura away for the last operation.

They could not wait for the emosékontrolí to be gone for good...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is the Coran confrontation and I will be wrapping everything together. I am so proud that I was able to finish this honestly. I'm tearing up a little bit.


	12. Coran Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exactly as the chapter title says, the much awaited Coran confrontation is here!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is technically the last chapter excluding the epilogue which I already have written and will probably post later today or tomorrow. Hope you all enjoy.

"And that should be everything sir Coran," Molion said with a sigh as the last of the equipment was being sent down to the surface of the planet. The light brown Emosíenen's gentle hand did little to rid Coran of the anxiety he was positive the Emosíenen could feel.

"I thank you again sir Molion, I do not know how we could repay this debt." To no surprise of Coran Molion simply shook his head and replied lightly.

"We should have been more careful and aware of the possibility of the paladins becoming corrupted. It was the least we could have done for all of you." There was a small pause, Molion hesitating for just a second before asking, "Do you believe you are ready to talk about your own emotions now?"

Coran wanted to say no. To send the kind and extremely friendly Emosíenen leader on his way so he could get to work.

But he knew that was not a smart move. That he would have to talk the paladins at some point and would rather have a clearer, calmer head when that time came. Besides, Molion did say they were the best at understanding emotions.

After a deep breath, Coran softly said, "I am afraid."

Without missing a beat Molion replied, "And that is okay."

With a shaky sigh, Coran continued,"I... I am afraid that the paladins will not trust me or look to me for advice again after this. They, they are still children, yet in this awful situation, more than once I've, I've left them alone, allowed them to take the pain for me. I have failed them so many times and this time when I was the one that was supposed to be in control, the only one without a parasite destroying their brains! I made the biggest mistake and let my own emotions control me! Shiro, poor Shiro, even when being controlled by the emosékontrolí he looked out for the other paladins better then I! I failed them and I would not blame them for never trusting me again, yet-yet I am still terrified."

At some point during Coran's rant, Molion moved to have a hand running in small circles on Coran's back. As soon as Molion was sure Coran was done he softly said, "Did they ever say they did not trust you?"

 

"...No."

"Did they ever said they blamed you?"

"...No."

"With the emosékontrolí out of their system have they ever shown signs of feeling this way towards you?"

"I do not know." Molion raised an eyebrow and Coran elaborated, "During the black paladin's operation I went to watch over but I could not handle it and ran away." Like a coward.

With an understanding hum, Molion nodded his head, "Sir Coran, I cannot speak for the Paladins or the Princess, but I do know that you need to speak with them. To listen to them and not the parasites in your head."

Coran's heart stopped in his chest and Molion immediately remedied his mistake, "No, no you are not corrupted by an outside parasite sir Coran. Rather you are plagued by one created in your own mind from the stress and fear." Coran relaxed but Molion did not stop. "Emotions are a strange thing sir Coran and while dealing with them alone may seem the best way or even the only one sure fire way to really recover from having those emotions after they had been pulled, twisted, manipulated, and bruised." Coran stared into the Emosíenen's piercing light brown eyes as he waited for him to continue.

"But the only way to truly heal is to open up and let the ones you love the most in to help make everything better one step at a time."

Coran did not say anything but Molion said what he wanted to say and promptly left. With fear still gripping his chest Coran gathered what little courage he had left and made his way to the lounging room.

* * *

The next few days pass extremely peacefully and Keith could not be more grateful. Everyone surprisingly needed a lot of sleep to recover fully and spent most of the days together in the lounging room occasionally going down together to the kitchen for food. 

The only thing that ruined the peace was the fact that Coran still refused to interact with any of them, except Pidge on very rare occasions. They knew they would probably have to take the first step in fixing it but that Shiro and Allura had spent the last few hours to devise a plan to corner Coran so they could have the talk. Multiple times they revised their plan or just completely changed it, with input from Lance and Pidge occasionally though both were more focused on something else than actually helping. 

Lance was chilling Hunk's lap playing with Keith's hair, humming a song softly simply enjoying his time with his brothers. Hunk had has his arms wrapped tightly around Lance's waist occasionally asking Lance what he would like to eat now that none of them were extremely exhausted and Hunk could actually cook again without fear something would happen to any of them. 

Not that this fact stopped any of them clinging to each other. 

Pidge was laying her head in Keith's lap tinkering away with a small gift from the Emosíenens, one they personally gave to Pidge upon her request. Allura was sitting right next to Pidge, the latter's legs laying across Allura's own lap as she talked to Shiro who sat on the couch above her. Shiro was laying his head on Hunk's shoulder, his own long legs taking up the rest of the couch in the most relaxing position Keith has ever seen him.

Keith was just enjoying the presence and warmth of his brothers and sisters, having no interest in joining any of the conversations but listening intently to all the same.

Shiro and Allura were finalizing their back up plans for cornering Coran when said ginger walked into the room. Keith would have laughed at the ironic-ness of it all if it were not for how surprising it was that Coran was in the same room as all of them at the same time. And he knew was not the only shocked when Pidge literally dropped the toy she was working on in her face. 

That managed to snap everyone out of their shock as Pidge immediately started saying she was fine but it wasn't until Allura actually examined Pidge's face and confirmed that she was indeed fine that everyone turned their attention back to Coran who stood awkwardly at the door refusing to look any of them. 

 

"Coran," Allura said softly, breaking the silence. "I- I know you are not comfortable still but we really do need to talk this time." Keith waited in anticipation for Coran to show signs of running away.

But he didn't.

For the first time in far too long, Coran looked at all of them without quickly looking away again. "Yes, I know Allura," he takes a deep breath and I am ready to talk now."

* * *

Part of Coran feels bad for ruining their obviously peaceful moment. He could not recall the paladins and Allura ever getting along so well. There always seemed to be something between all of them that kept them from truly relaxing around each other, and now they can sit in each others laps like it is the most natural thing in the world. 

It warmed Coran's heart to know some good truly did come out of this hellish incident and it even helped ease away the anxiety he held for the upcoming conversation.

Coran watched as they all shifted so everyone was sitting up and properly facing Coran but still close together as if to remind each other they are still there. Once they were all settled Shiro spoke up, "Coran, first and foremost I want you to know that none of us blame you for anything that has happened since the emosékontrolí became a problem. If anything we are extremely thankful for you." Shiro seemed to be staring deep into to Coran's soul as if to everything in his power to convince Coran of the sincerity of his words.

Lance chimed in enthusiastically, "Yeah, if it were not for you everything would have ended a thousand times worse. You held each of us together even when it felt like the whole universe was falling apart around us!" It had been so long since Lance's blue eyes shined as brightly as they did in this moment that Coran just barely kept himself from crying.  

 

Coran bit his lips and looked down, "I truly do not-"

"I am going to stop you right there!"

Coran jerked his head up to look directly into Pidge's determined and slightly angry eyes her whole body tense with rage that was similarly mirrored in the others almost exactly.

"You very much  _do_ deserve the praise we are giving you," she stated leaving no room for argument yet continued on anyway, "because you did everything they said. You held us together. You saved us. Hell! You even fixed the problems between us that were always there just not as blatant before the emosékontrolí!"

"Yes there were some extremely points but those are unavoidable." Hunk said, his voice so comforting just as the paladins described his hugs on numerous occasions, but it was more than that. There was a sense of understanding that seemed to be embedded into each word. "I for one have many of my own regrets. Things I have done these past few weeks that I am not proud of. But they are also things that, after a lot of convincing," he spares a quick glance at Lance who smiled back, "I realized were things outside of my control and while I do hate what I did I cannot take it back. I have to accept it and accept it was never truly my fault and you should too." The others nodded along and looked at Coran with a hopeful gleam that killed the old Altean.

Coran shook his head shamefully, not able to look any of them in the eye, "I was supposed to be the responsible one. The one you could all rely on! The-"

"But you are-"

"NO, I AM NOT," Coran bellowed looking up in time to watch all of them flinch back in fear. A part of Coran knew he should stop there, to calm down and breathe. To give them a chance to breathe and relax a bit before he continued. But he did not listen to that part of himself.

"You,  _all of you_ , are a thousand, no _a billion_ times more reliable than me!! You all had your brains infected with parasites that not only fed off your emotions but also controlled you and  _still_ managed to hold yourselves together!!"

 

"Did you not hear us tell you that you were the one that was holding us together?!" Coran was not sure who said that their voice cracked and it was just another blow to Coran reminding him just how incompetent he was. 

"MAYBE IN THE BEGINNING BUT WHEN THINGS REALLY STARTED FALLING APART?! WHEN YOU  _REALLY_ NEEDED ME MOST?! WHEN I WAS THE _ONLY ONE_  SUPPOSEDLY CAPABLE OF  _CONTROLLING_ THEIR EMOTIONS?! I WAS MOST DEFINITELY  _NOT_ THE ONE HOLDING YOU TOGETHER!!  _YOU_ WERE DOING THAT  _YOURSELVES_!!  _YOU_ WERE PUTTING ASIDE YOUR RESENTMENT AND DISAGREEMENTS WITH EACH OTHER!!  _YOU_ WERE THE ONES WHO TOOK CHARGE!!  _YOU_ WERE THE ONES THAT DID WHATEVER IT TOOK TO PROTECT EACH OTHER!!  _YOU_ WERE  _ALWAYS_ THE FIRST ONES ON THE SCENE AND  _ALWAYS_ RISKING YOUR LIVES WHILE I JUST, JUST  _SAT AROUND USELESSLY_!! JUST BARELY HOLDING YOU TOGETHER AND GETTING  _SOMETHING_ DONE!! WHAT I DO IS  _BARELY_ EVEN CONSIDERED  _SUPPORTING_ YOU!! THERE IS SO LITTLE  _I_ CAN DO TO HELP YOU! TO SUPPORT YOU!! TO PROTECT YOU!! I DO NOT DESERVE YOUR PRAISE WHEN YOU ARE ALL SO MUCH STRONGER THAN I COULD EVER BE!!"

Coran was struggling to breathe, his chest felt heavy and hard, his hot and wet, and a sob escapes his lips as his legs give out from under. "You are all so strong," even to himself, Coran's voice sounded weak and broken. "I just wish I could be strong enough to properly support you all."

Heavy and painful silence filled the room, the soft sobbing not even being able to break through and for a moment Coran was sure he got his point across. That they all realized just how right he was and how they would be just fine without him.

That was until Keith spoke up, his voice so clear and strong much like his lion and the paladin before him.

"I disagree Coran. You are one of the  _strongest_ people I know. Being able to wake up from a ten thousand year sleep  _knowing_ that your home and loved ones would probably be gone forever once you woke up and still being able to laugh, joke, and fight? That  _is_ strength. To bring together and manage to get a group of a species you have  _never_ encountered before work together and become a symbol of hope in a universe  _devoid_ of hope? That takes a lot more strength than I could ever imagine. To fix up  _this_ ," he gestures to the walls around, "ten thousand plus-year-old ship to the point that it has  _saved our lives_ more times than I could ever count? To go above and beyond to _train us_? To take time to connect with each of us so we feel even a  _tiny bit_ more at home more comfortable? To learn about our species as much as you can so that you can heal us up properly? All of that takes so much strength and dedication sometimes I wonder how you do it and it  _does not stop there_.  _You_ , Coran, have done _so much_ for all of us, you have given up _so much for all of us_ ," Keith's voice begins to crack and Coran can see the tears forming in the young boys' eyes. "So much that we could never, ever repay you. But, no one can be strong forever. Everyone trips and falls. And for a man who has already done _so much,_  supported us so much, a few trips means  _nothing_."

 

At the end of his speech, Keith was full on crying, holding onto Lance for support who was also crying. They were all crying yet somehow Coran did not feel guilt like before, no it was a strange kind warmness and voice in the far corner of his head boldly stating that Keith was right and that they all agreed.

Allura uselessly wiped her tears and walked up to Coran wrapping him up in a tight hug, "We never, not once, not even for half a tick, thought you were useless. I would have flown have given up the second I stepped out of that cryo-replenisher had you not been there to support me. I would have shortly after given up on the paladins had you not been there. We surely would have died numerous times had you not been there." She pulled away from the hug and glared directly into Coran's eyes, "I do not know where you got the belief that you were not supporting us well or enough. That we would have been fine without you because I would not be as close to the paladins as I am now if it were not for you."

At some point, while Allura was talking the paladins came up and surrounded them in an impossibly tight yet comfortable hug, "We are completely useless without you Coran." Lance's voice was muffled by Allura's shoulder but showed no sign of trying to fix it. "You have told me more than once that we are all irreplaceable and a necessity for this team, for Voltron, and I assumed you knew that meant you too. You are like a father Coran. Watching over us all, doing all of the behind the scenes work to make sure everything is running smoothly. Without you, we are nothing more than a group of children with big dreams." A sob escaped from Coran because Lance was right that was exactly what they were a group of children.

When Lance continued Coran could only cry harder as the boy's words resonated inside him.  _"You make us Voltron, Defenders of the Universe."_

 

* * *

 

 

After a few more hours of crying on the floor with the occasional apologies slipping through, the little dysfunctional family decides to make their way down to the kitchen for the first real family dinner for all of them. 

Hunk and Lance lead the group, Hunk spewing off ideas on what space equivalent of a meal they should try next and Lance going along with every suggestion making a huge show of drooling everywhere. Keith and Pidge are barely a step or two behind just far enough that they don't get hit by Lance's spit. Both of them yelling at Lance for being so disgusting yet still laughing as if it was the funniest thing in the world. 

Allura is trialing all of them turning back once to give both Shiro and Coran a pointed look that screamed  _Stay here and have an actual conversation!!_ before disappearing with the others. Leaving Shiro and Coran in awkward silence. 

Shiro took a deep breath and opened his mouth to say something but Coran was just a second faster, "I am sorry!"

Shiro knew why Coran was sorry, or at least had a good idea, but then again he never realized Coran was bottling up so much self-hate in the first place so he decided it was better to be safe than sorry. "What for exactly. We all have already told that it is okay for you to not be perfect."

Coran shook his head and looked Shiro directly in the eyes, "No. This one is much more specific. Do you remember the time when we got into an argument when Lance and Keith had asked us what was going on between Allura and the rest of you?"

Shiro furrowed his eyebrows focusing really hard. He remembered little bits and pieces of the argument and realizing that it was the emosékontrolí that was causing the emptiness but that was about it. "A bit. It is fuzzy since I was being controlled by the emosékontrolí."

Coran flinched at the mention of the emosékontrolí but quickly continued. "Well, that day I realized how little control over emotions I had. Especially when it concerned Allura and before you try to tell me it was not my fault hear me out." Shiro gave Coran a quick nod and Coran continued.

 

"You, or maybe it was the emosékontrolí, argued that I was always taking Allura's side and whether or not we cared. During the argument, I was so wrapped up in what you were saying that while I realized something was wrong I did not actively look for it. I was fully aware that you did not get into such emotional arguments if you could avoid it but I completely overlooked that. And because of my failure to acknowledge those things I allowed you, Lance, and Keith, all who were extremely susceptible to the emosékontrolí, get taken over. I know and I am beginning to accept that there was nothing I could do but, I still want to apologize for it. So I am sorry."

Shiro could understand why Coran felt the need to apologize and knew from personal what it was Coran was truly looking for. What Coran possibly did not realize himself that he was looking for. 

"I forgive you, Coran," Shiro found it slightly amusing how Coran's eyes went wide from a simple sentence. "I forgive you for everything." And with that Shiro made his way to follow the rest of their little family. Shiro clearly heard Coran say something just before they left the lounge but it was extremely soft and the Coran looked forward without the hesitation that had been there for far too long told Shiro that he did not need to respond to it. 

_ "Thank you."  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And peace and happiness reigned over the castle ever since~ The End.
> 
> Lol jk still got the epilogue! Then this train wreck of a fic will be over


	13. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Ending~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Undertaleuniverse and everyone who commented cause I know for a fact that without your comments each chapter I would not have been able to complete this little fic. And for those who read but did not comment I am glad you enjoyed my work! <3

Lance woke up alone his room to the sound of Blues gentle purring. With a glance at his clock, Lance stretched his arms over his head lazily, confident that he had plenty of time to spare before breakfast would be ready. As he did his normal morning routine Lance recalled the weeks since the operation.

 

How for the longest none of them would leave each other's side except to fight the Galra empire and then would immediately come back together more than happy enough to be in each other's arms again. Mornings spent laughing, evenings spent cuddling. Meals spent together no matter what and training that was less painful than ever before.

There were bad moments. When stress would raise Allura's voice and sharpen her words. Times when Shiro would get so lost in his head that Keith would hide away in the training room. After close battles when Hunk and Pidge ran off to their respective places of comfort, doing their best to destress but not really being able to. Days when Coran or Lance would succumb to the dark thoughts in their heads with no clear way out. 

But even then, even when the universe crashed around them and threatened to kill them, every day without fail for mealtime they would gather and eat together. No matter who was mad at who or how far lost someone was in their own heads.

_Beep! Beep!_

Lance's alarm startled him out of his thoughts and back to what he was actually doing, but it seemed he had already completed his morning routine. With a shrug of his shoulders, Lance got dressed in his casual clothes and made his way to the dining room sure the rest of his family would be there as well.

As he expected they were.

Pidge and Allura chatting away about some little device Pidge had constructed last night. Coran very loudly complaining about how he was an excellent cook and should be allowed inside his own kitchen while Shiro consoled him with a weak laugh and a pat on the shoulder. Hunk and Keith come in with breakfast and plates in their arms, both with large smiles on their faces. "Breakfast is served!!"

Everyone cheers and digs in as soon as the food is sat down on the table. Keith grabbed two plates, one in each a hand and held one out to Lance. "Here you go Lance." Immediately every one turns to Lance and speaks at the same time. 

"What are you even doing over there? Hurry it up!" Pidge exclaimed waving their hand excitedly.

"I made your favorite! Space bacon!!" Hunk cheered, probably more excited for the meal than anyone else.

"Better hurry or we will eat it all." Shiro teases with a carefree smile.

"Do not worry Lance, I will not let them eat it all," Allura laughed her shoulders shaking as she shoves Shiro's own shoulder.

"Sit my boy! I need to side with me on who's cooking is better!" Coran slapped the cushion of the chair next to him while Shiro laughed even harder.

Lance could feel his smile grow larger and his cheeks start to hurt as he ran over to Keith throwing an arm over his brother's shoulder. "I don't think I can take your side on this one Coran! Don't want to give Hunk any reason to steal my space bacon!" Everyone except Coran laughed and Lance wanted nothing more than for this moment to last forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ack, I am tearing up,, I never thought this day would come. My first multi-chapter fic officially completed. This is an accomplishment I never thought I would have gotten to. Thanks again for all of the support and love!!


End file.
